(Closed) Bridal Store Depression

posted 9 years ago in Dress
Post # 17
12 posts
  • Wedding: October 2013

I think you look FANTASTIC in the third dress (your favorite)!!  It is my favorite, too, and the minimal amount of beading gives it just enough bling, but it’s not over the top.

I also really like the second dress, maybe with a little bit of beading or crystals on a sash to liven it up.

I have to disagree with your FI’s favorite — there is too much going on with the sweetheart neckline, the sash and the ruffles.

Good luck in your search, and you look great!


Post # 18
645 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Ok, first of all I think it’s a damn shame that you would be treated the way that you were by the bridal consultants!  I was a consultant for a formal dress shop for 5 years and always made a point to put forth extra effort to help make self-conscious girls, especially full figured girls, feel special and beautiful when they would come in and try on dresses.  It hurts my heart that you were so badly treated 🙁 

So many of the dresses you’ve posted on here are very beautiful!  I especially loved the second one, the simpler dress, mostly because you can choose to keep it simple or jazz it up big time with fabulous jewelry, shoes, sash, you name it!  Don’t get discouraged…you will find the right dress and it will be absolutely perfect 🙂

Post # 19
764 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Have you thought about getting a dress made online by a shop like Jasmine’s Bridal? I’ve never used them but tons of Bees are very happy with their dresses.  They can take one you liked, like the Melissa Sweet, and make it to your measurements for a lot less $$.  

Post # 20
6317 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

@Miss Moxy:  For what it’s worth, I’ve seen much bigger girls than you look great in their dresses. Dress shopping isn’t fun for everyone… but shows like Say Yes to the Dress build it up.

Personally I don’t even like clothes shopping, so shopping for an expensive dress I’m supposed to wear on the best day of my life (so I’m told) is tremendous pressure. We’re eloping and I am going w. something simple to alleviate some of that pressure!

A few years ago I went dress shopping for a friend’s wedding (I needed something to wear). I spent about 10 hours (no joke) looking for one. At the time I had really large boobs (I’ve since had a reduction). Anything I tried that fit the boobs wouldn’t fit anywhere else. I was probably around 130 lbs. then, so not exactly overweight. It was extremely depressing. I finally found something that fit… but it was so short that I was pulling it down all night and my mom still makes fun of me for wearing it to this day. I keep telling her it was my only option at the time.

Anyway, the point I am trying to make is that just because you’re considered ‘plus size’ doesn’t mean that others have a super easy time dress shopping either. We all have our perceived flaws, and it sometimes takes many dressed to find the right fit. So don’t get discouraged. You will find the one, and you don’t look horrible in any of those pics!

Post # 21
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I LOVE LOVE LOVE the snow white dress on you. You looked really happy with that one on. Like a PP said, maybe they could do something to the beading under you arm so it didn’t bother you?

Keep you head up, you looked gorgeous!

Post # 22
2419 posts
Buzzing bee

@Miss Moxy:  Yup, they have a wide range of gowns in a wide range of sizes. Many of them are donated by regular women of all shapes and sizes. Some of the new ones are discontinued styles from David’s or other shops (in whatever sizes are left, so there tend to be options at the larger and smaller ends of the size range), some are samples, some are just outright donations from shops/designers/companies, some are for tax write-offs, etc., but they have a whole bunch of gowns in every size. I’m sure there will be dozens that you will be able to try on.

A lot of the pre-owned ones have been altered, of course, (and bridal sizing is so wonky to begin with) so the BABC people do their best to group them by size, but then you can just go through the racks and pull stuff you’d like to try on and see if it will work. There will also be volunteers there to help you pull stuff, and the seamstresses will be able to help you if you find something close-but-not-quite-right that you might be able to alter to make it work for you.

When I went, the first few dresses I attempted to try were too small (because of the weird sizing + having been altered) but I just kept on looking at stuff across a range of sizes. I probably tried on close to fifty dresses by the time I was done. I kept coming back to this one, and eventually found a really gorgeous piece (a removeable lace overdress) from another gown to complement it. When I put the two together, they just looked so perfect … now, at a regular bridal shop, no way would they let you buy one gown plus a piece of another because they go together so well (unless you shelled out for both gowns!) but the BABC ladies allowed me to, because they were confident they could still sell the bottom part of the second gown as a stand-alone dress. They were *SO* nice and accommodating and flexible. Definitely worth checking out. I also loved that I was able to walk out of there with a gown that very day, rather than ordering and waiting around and having dress regret in the meantime.

Post # 23
2419 posts
Buzzing bee

Whoops, double post!

Post # 25
2060 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I really love the one with the red sash on you! Although, I’d probably chang the color of the sash to match the dress or just slightly accent it with champagne.

Post # 27
195 posts
Blushing bee

I think you look amazing in the empire waist dresses. I am not typically plus size but in the world of sample sizes my hips meant bigger dresses. THe first shop I went to they did nothing but make me feel fat. I think getting a great consultant would help.  Go back to wear they made you feel good about yourself and find your dress there. Or find another store and ask about the variety in sizes before you get there. If i had to pick from what you have shown I would pick the 3rd dress with no sash. 

Post # 28
940 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Rosehill Community Center

@Miss Moxy:  this probably sounds crazy, but I think you would look amazing in a dress that I tried on, the St. Patrick Argelia.  

It’s just a little lower than an empire waist, and I have a belly (I’m a size 12-14) that it completely concealed.  It came in at my thinnest and made me look a lot skinnier!  And it wasn’t crazy expensive.  It was the only dress that made me tear up, because I was so relieved that there were dresses out there that could look really nice.

Plus it is amazing how trying on samples that are at least close to the right size can really make you feel and look much better.  I went to so many appointments, and tried on so many dresses.  It got to the point where if the sample was a size 4 or 6, I didn’t even bother because I wasn’t going to like it.  If you can, call ahead and ask if they have your size in any samples.  Some of the smaller shops ended up having way more than I expected.  

And once you decide what kind of silhouette both flatters you and makes you feel happier inside, it gets a lot easier!  Ignore any inner negativity, because you will find a great dress!

Post # 29
74 posts
Worker bee

I hate how bridal consultants can be sometimes, even though I am one. 

Your fiance’s likes his favourite because it shows of your figure and he loves it! And rightly so.

If you want plain at the top and flowers at the bottom maybe sweetheart 5990 is something for you? Don’t know if they sell this brand in America though.

Post # 30
2478 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014 - Manhattan Church Rec Center

Your not that big! i HATE how bridal gowns are made super skinny!

Post # 31
2014 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Have you tried on anything by Mori Lee ? This designer is made for the curvy bride !!!! I’m sorry that you are feeling so defeated, I would not return to any salon that treated you poorly. I honestly don’t understand the frustration that some salons have expecting you to choose a dress once you have tried on maybe 5 in total, especially for the price that we are all paying. If it takes 50 dresses for you to find the right one so be it. I love the first one!!! The second, the third and the fourth ones flatter your shape the best. If your Fiance is the only one available to attend the appointments with you then so be it. I took mine to a few appts for the same reason. WE are happily ever after married now and she was floored by my Bridal look, didn’t know which dress until the day. Good luck and keep hunting 

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