Post # 1
I have three bridesmaids that have been my friends since high school and we are now in our 30’s. They recently shared some concerns with me, about not meeting my fiance. My fiance and i have been together in total of 7 years, but we have broken up twice and now realized we are soulmates and can’t wait to get married. My bridesmaids all live in different cities from me now, but we are all so close and make it a mission to see eachother and have monthly calls together, and I consider them sisters and I love them. Well they let me know just recently all at once that they are disapointed they have not met my fiance. I wholeheartdely apologized and am actively trying to get him to meet them now. But, I still feel like they don’t forgive me or there is a bigger issue still. One of them backed out just recently due to a work obligation the week of my wedding and I feel like them not meeting him during this time, they may be questioning who I am as a friend. If I had known how important this was to them, I would have tried to initiate this alot sooner….now we our 6 months out before my wedding and I feel like my friendships are in jeopardy. I just feel so numb and I feel like my apologies are not being heard or accepted….
Post # 2
You’re concerned that your bridesmaids aren’t forgiving you for not meeting your fiancé sooner? You yourself said one had a work obligation so why do you feel as though you are losing that friendship?
If you feel strongly about this then have your remaining two girls meet him via Skype or something along those lines.
Post # 3
kathymoreira : Yes, I am concerned they are not accepting my apology. There argument is that it has been 7 years and they haven’t met him. For the most part they have lived in different cities during I and my fiance’s relationship. They said just like the 4 of us make it a point to say connected, i should have pushed harder for them to meet him. I just feel they are questioning our whole friendship and I am really hurt. I understand what they are saying, and I am trying to arrange for them to meet him. The reason I said that I feel like I am losing friendships is because the same day she told me she had to travel for work, is the same day we had our monthly skype call and they all laid there concerns out to me. I feel like they had this conversation behind my back and just piled it all on me. I just feel very hurt from friends I consider family.
Post # 4
In 7 years they’ve never met him? That seems really odd to me if you truly do consider them like your family. Was it not important to you for them to know him at all?
My best friends are all scattered all over the country too. It was SO SO important to me for them to meet my husband before we even became engaged. I wanted them to like him and for him to like them as well. Now we all take trips together and travel to see each other. They’re all friends!
Post # 5
bellaharrison : Could this be their way of expressing that they’re concerned for you, or that they aren’t as sure as you that he’s the right guy? I have no way of knowing, but it’s one possibility.
Post # 6
bellaharrison : Honestly I think they are concerned about your relationship. You said you have broken up a few times, you talk about soul mates and they have never met the guy. Honestly it would be a red flag for me as a friend.
One of my closest friends lives in Sweden whilst I live in Australia. When we both got serious about our partners we introduced them via skype. Her and her partner skyped into our engagement party and vice versa plus we both made the effort to organise a time to meet.
I am guessing they are either concerned for you or feel like there isn’t much of friendship if they have never been introduced to your partner of 7 years.
Post # 7
Yeah, I’m with the others here thinking this is probably less about them being mad at you and more them being concerned / unsure about your decision to marry this guy. I would definitely have some concerns if one of my best friends was about to marry a guy she had broken up with multiple times and who I’d never met once in 7 years…
Post # 8
I think it’s extremely odd that none of your 3 bffs have met your fiancé at any point in the last 7 years. Were you never in your hometown at the same time? Or not invited to any mutual friends’ weddings? Or made plans to meet up for a weekend trip? Was he never home during your monthly Skype dates?
I literally cannot imagine dating someone for 7 years and not one of my besties having met my SO. It’s REALLY weird if your friendship is as close as you think it is.
Post # 9
bellaharrison : I feel that if you are as close to these girls as you say you are, at some point in 7 years they would have met him. I feel ‘an instinct’ or possibility that this is a bad relationship or there are reasons you didn’t let them meet him. What are the reasons you broke up twice and how long were you apart each time?
Post # 10
7 YEARS?! My best friend from high school has been with her boyfriend for about 10 months and I met him the other day. We don’t live far from each other so she could have made the effort to introduce us sooner but tbh we’re not bridesmaid status close so it’s whatver but it did confirm that we weren’t as close as we used to be so maybe your friends do feel a little slighted.
Post # 11
To be honest I would find it a little worrying if I hadn’t met my best friend’s fiancé in the entire 7 years the had been together.
How has this never happened?