(Closed) Brides over 30 – how many BMs

posted 10 years ago in 30 Something
Post # 153
Member
806 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

I’ll be 36 when I get married, and I think I just want one Maid/Matron of Honor….In case BF cannot decide between his two best friends I may have to add a Bridesmaid or Best Man too.  But I definitely want a small group!

 

Post # 154
Member
100 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@ winescarlet – I have the EXACT same stituation as you (even down to the year!) I was a Bridesmaid or Best Man in my friend’s wedding too. We were super duper close in college, but through distance (200 mi.) and time (her wedding was the last time I saw her and that was in 2004), we’ve lost touch and now we pretty much only wish each other a “Happy Birthday” on Facebook every year. I decided not to ask her to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man, but she and her husband are definitely invited. She seemed to be excited about attending and even sent me an FB message about trying to make plans to get time off from work to attend.

I think your friend would understand why she isn’t a Bridesmaid or Best Man. Things change 🙂 Are you inviting her to the wedding?

Post # 155
Member
37 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I’ll be 37 when we get married, and have 5 bridesmaids.  As many PPs have said, it’s more about the importance to me of having them at my side when Fiance and I exchange vows, and not so much about wild bachelorette weekends or late-night invitation/favor/fill-in-the-blank work sessions.

A definite plus about bridal parties in our thirties:  at our ages, all but one of them are already married, which I’ve found makes them an incredible resource in our wedding planning! I can ask them how they handled different aspects of wedding planning, get logistical advice and invaluable heads-ups about things it might not occur to me to think of in advance, but that are likely to come up.  They’ve all helped in one way or another, and I’m grateful to have each of them in my wedding party.

Your mileage may vary, but if you’ve got 5 ladies in mind, by all means ask them!  There’s no magical age limit where you can no longer “get away with” a bridal party, or where the Wedding Police sniff and snark at you for having the people dearest to you stand at your side as you experience a major life milestone.  And if anyone *does* look askance, it speaks to *their* having some issue of their own… which doesn’t have to become your issue.  (My mother, for example, thinks it’s gaudy and excessive for *anyone* to have more than one bridesmaid, regardless of the bride’s age.  That’s her deal, not mine or anyone else’s that I know, and I don’t worry about it.)

Bottom line:  do what feels right to you, in this case.  You’re not risking hurting anyone by asking your 5 prospective bridesmaids to stand up with you.  One question to consider: would any of them feel hurt if you *didn’t* ask them to be bridesmaids?

Post # 156
Member
1663 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

We’ll be 31 (me) and 35 (him) when we get married, and will probably have 6 on each side.  None of the ladies have kids (though one may be pg soon and be a mom before my wedding), but half of the guys do.

 

I think you can do whatever you want!

Post # 157
Member
1663 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

View original reply
@winescarlet:  No!  My fiance is having this same problem… but you are definitely not obligated to have someone in your wedding just because you were in theirs.

Post # 158
Member
478 posts
Helper bee

I’ll be 34 and will have 3 bridesmaids.  One got married last year, one’s getting married in 2 weeks, and the other got engaged this year.  So we are all, well, early enough in love and marriage for this to still be fun and exciting for all of us.  None of us have children.  I have no sisters, so these are all my friends.  I’m buying their dresses as a gift.

Post # 159
Member
1329 posts
Bumble bee

I am having zero. Zip, zilch, nada.

I am having a small wedding and have too many girlfriends..so if I didn’t ask one, there would be hell to pay. So everyone is a guest! 🙂

Post # 160
Member
2692 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

32 and having 6 bridesmaids.  They are all my around my age ( except for my younger 14 year old sister and my mom LOL).  And they are all happy to be in my wedding.  Age plays no role.

Post # 161
Member
166 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’m going to be 35 when I get married and have 6 bridesmaids.  One childhood friend one from college, and then another who I’ve known for a decade.  the other 3 are parts of my recent future who are a part of my life and have helped me through a lot of major transitions.

These are the women who have helped me through my timeline to where me and my husband met.  So, I’m honored to have them by my side.

Post # 162
Member
14 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: December 2012

I will be 32 when we marry. On my side I have 1 Maid/Matron of Honor & 5 Bridesmaid or Best Man only two of my girls are not family.

Post # 163
Member
45 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2017

I’m always amazed that so many people are having some of the same thoughts and concerns as I am. I’m 37 and I will be 38 when I get married and my Maid/Matron of Honor is the only person that was in my previous wedding (happily divorced) and I felt funny asking people, so after long thought and prayer  I decided on my few

Post # 164
Member
484 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’m 36, no bridal party at all.   Small wedding, 55 guests.

Post # 165
Member
780 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I’m 40. My Matron of Honour is FI’s sister and Bridemaid is FI’s niece

Post # 166
Member
899 posts
Busy bee

I may have just my sister, but maybe none at all. I’d be completely fine with none. For me, the less fuss the better.

 

Post # 167
Member
14 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I’m having 4 bridesmaids. My two daughter and FI’s two daughters ages 18,17,16 and 14.

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