Brides Personal Attendant?!

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

I have never known anyone to have one… what does one do?  

Post # 4
Member
1995 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

um, I might be insulted if someone asked me to be their personal attendant.  is that an honor or responsibility?  do they get paid or what?  what do they do?  is it more than a DOC?  yikes… be careful what you say and how it comes out – unless your group of friends is used to that.

also I wouldn’t print any to do list just yet, see how she feels first.  then go all bridal on her.

Post # 5
Member
14495 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I am having one.  I printed out a bunch of stuff and then took that and made my own list according to what I anticipate my needs will be. 

Post # 6
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

I might be insulted if someone asked me to be their personal attendant

me too – ive heard of bridesmaids and moh but what is a personal attendant – a unpaid slave for the duration???

 

Post # 7
Member
654 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I have never heard of this!

Post # 9
Member
1995 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would have gotten anoyed if I had one!  Maybe I’m just low stress and was very level headed on my wedding day (and every day) but I wouldn’t have wanted to entertain/talk to/keep busy/feed anyone else than necessary!  I’m perfectly capable of asking for or doing the attendant things myself!

to each her own.

Post # 10
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

be her “BITCH” for the day!

wow – im glad i dont have friends asking me to be their personal attendant for the day.  im generally a can do person that loves to help out but it doesnt sound like much of an honor to me. goodluck!

 

Post # 11
Member
645 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I think it’s definitely a Midwest thing. My friend from Iowa mentioned having one…and I was like, wtf is a personal attendant?? We don’t have them in CA.

Post # 12
Member
5787 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2011

I’ve heard of them up here but I thought the venue provided them and you had to tip them? I don’t see what a personal attendant would do that my bms couldn’t do.

Post # 13
Member
5118 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I agree it’s probably a midwest thing. I’m having one, but it’s more of my ‘little sister’ type friend who’s too young to be a bridesmaid and I’m not into the whole jr. bridesmaid thing.  I wouldn’t hand over a list right away, just see if she has some questions. I think it’s a great way to include another friend, get to share the dressing up time and hanging out time with her on the big day.

I don’t think that she’s your ‘[email protected]*#!’ or anything of that sort. It should be an honor and treated as one, not someone to make demands of. The train fluff-er before you go down the aisle, the go-to girl when you suddenly need a tampon or your bustle ripped or something, she’s your ‘clutch chick,’ always there when you need her. It’s helpful to have someone who can run to the car to grab something during photos or help direct guests while the bridal party is doing photos or something of that nature.

Post # 14
Member
7300 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@peaches4bruce: Don’t do it. You will come off as a bridezilla. What do you expect your bridesmaids to do?

Post # 15
Member
7174 posts
Busy Beekeeper

Honestly – I would wait to see if she offered to help with the wedding and THEN ask her.  I wouldn’t mind helping a bride/friend for the day one bit – but I might be kind of taken back for her to ask.  Although, unless she was a dear friend, I would say ‘no’… so, I guess it’s par for the course.  I would wait to give her a list until AFTER you ask and at another time.  If she accepts, just tell her you plan to brainstorm a list of things you think might be duties and to let you know if she’d be up to the task.

Post # 16
Member
654 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I was the personal attendant for my friend and she is going to be mine.  She volunteered, otherwise, I doubt I would have asked.  Really it just meant that I got the bridesmaid fun without having to spend the money on the bridesmaid dress.  Yes, I did end up doing things for her to help out but it wasn’t really that much.  The biggest thing I had to do was drive to one of the BM’s apt’s b/c she forgot the belt that went with the dress.  Otherwise, I just hung out with the bridal party all day.  However, we do joke about being the bride’s bitch.  🙂

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