(Closed) Bride's post on FB…..How would YOU react?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: How would YOU react?
    Say nothing and respond when you hear back from your boss : (272 votes)
    73 %
    Decline even if you do get the day off : (49 votes)
    13 %
    Don't return the RSVP at all : (11 votes)
    3 %
    Other (explain) : (20 votes)
    5 %
    YAY POLLS! I only clicked your thread because of the poll. Nothing to add :) : (22 votes)
    6 %
  • Post # 3
    3182 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Yeah that’s a little crazy. And if she’s that way this long before the wedding, I’m not sure I’d want to be in her company the day of. 

    Post # 4
    246 posts
    Helper bee

    Bridezilla alert!  I would ignore her comment and just ensure that your RSVP is in on time, regardless of your response…as I’m sure you would have done anyways.  Hopefully she is an otherwise sane person who can plead temporary insanity due to wedding planning stress.

    Post # 5
    2363 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2013 - B&B

    Um, I wouldnt’ say anything, but I would be peeved. You gave me the RSVP date. As long as you get it BY that date, that IS “a timely manner”. The timely manner that YOU AS THE BRIDE CHOSE! Geesh. 

    But like I said, I wouldn’t say anything on her fb or anything, I’d just hope that my boss got back to me soon.

    Post # 6
    1299 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    Yeah I kind of feel like she jumped the gun just a teeny bit… but I kind of feel for her too…..  It may not be directed to you.  She may be getting a jab in at someone like the wedding party member who hasnt yet responded and they are waiting on multiple things until they get the word (been there doing that!)  Almost NONE of my wedding party has responded yet… and its annoying because i KNOW youre coming just help me out by not making me stalk you to find out if you want the chicken or beef please!  It seems so little but im at the point where if i have to text or FB msg our entire wedding party to find that out when it could take them two seconds to mail that card that Ive already put a stamp on… im gonna flip!  Its hard to sometimes understand the 3,000 things per day that a bride who is handling everything on her own has to do… and in my case everyone is coming to me to ask questions that i have already addressed!

    Anyway… i just sent a text to a bunch of the wedding party members to spread the word about rsvps to everyone to get them in, as a friendly reminder.  But i have to stand by your bride in saying i too am saying if i dont hear from you you absolutely wont have a seat and you wont have a plate.  Im going to wait for the rsvps, and then ask fi’s mom to track down her side while I track down mine.  After that there will be no begging, no interrogating, and no gnashing of teeth!  Its done.  Soooo… maybe just message her and appeal to her a bit to say, hey mine is by my door waiting to get the ok from work then as soon as I know you will know too.  I really hope i get to come I’m really looking forward to it! 

    Post # 7
    4046 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    Do you have other mutual friends who are attending the wedding that you want to see?

    If you are only going for the bride/groom, I would decline. Or maybe I’d get my RSVP postmarked today and then mail it in three weeks.

    Post # 8
    9181 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2013 - Rocky Mountains USA

    That’s kinda bitchy and crazy… but she’s probably just stressed out.  I don’t think it’s worth declining over, and I’m sure she’ll be super psyched to party with you too.

    Post # 9
    263 posts
    Helper bee

    As long as she didn’t aim the post directly at you (i.e. on your wall/tag you), you really have no place to say anything. Out of spite, if I wasn’t great friends with her, I might not return the RSVP at all and just not go. However, if you still want to go after clearance from your boss, just do the “right thing,” return the RSVP, and go to the wedding.

    Post # 10
    1849 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    To decline to go to her wedding just over this post or to withold the RSVP completely just to spite her would be a disproportionate response. She’s a stressed out bride close to her wedding. This isn’t classy, but she doesn’t deserve outright retaliation for it. Nobody’s perfect, and she must be your friend, so cut her some slack. I’ve seen many bees post to ask whether they can hound people for RSVPs before the deadline. If it pisses you off that badly, just RSVP no as soon as possible since you’re  obviously not good friends anyway.

    Post # 11
    1112 posts
    Bumble bee

    That’s annoying. I sent out invitations two days ago, and yesterday I posted this:

    “Consider yourself forewarned: people who do not RSVP to weddings are not nice people. Haha.

    …but seriously. :)”

    I got a bunch of likes and some annoying “this is my rsvp!” comments. ugh. haha. but besides that I hope I didn’t sound like THIS crazy gal.

    Post # 12
    1710 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2013 - Walt Disney World

    Wow, she must be super stressed (or just a bridezilla)!  I would probably say “There’s still 10 days…”  She’s the one who set the deadline, sheesh!

    Post # 13
    1902 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    My fiance posted something similar a week or so ago, just reminding everyone to get them in on time. I think it was a little poorly worded to say “Don’t turn up without an RSVP,” but she’s probably just stressed or frustrated with people that either should be coming and haven’t RSVP’d, or are being very vague about whether or not they’ll be there.

    Post # 14
    9139 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

    Meh. She’s under a lot of stress and the caterer wants their numbers.

    Post # 15
    692 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2013

    My Mother-In-Law made a slightly annoyed post about RSVPs, but that was a week AFTER the RSVP date, and we didn’t have half of them.  But 10 days BEFORE the date?  That’s a little much.  I recieved most of my RSVPs about 3-4 days after the date had passed, because a lot of people just try to get it in the mail by the date, rather than try to mail it early enough that its in your hands before the date passes.

    Post # 16
    1684 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    I bet she has only recieved 10% of her RSVPs and she’s feeling a little temperary insanity right now 🙂

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