(Closed) Brides that did not dance with your father

posted 5 years ago in Music
Post # 2
Member
727 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

I didn’t dance wth my father  because he is shy, so I just had the first dance with my husband and then opened the dance floor for everyone!

Post # 3
Member
1266 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

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juneberries:  Same as 
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dachshundpup15: for me. 

I’ve honestly never seen a father/daughter dance done at a wedding in New Zealand, so just did the first dance with DH and then went straight into the music for everyone to join in. 

Later in the night when he was already on the dance floor and I came along, my step mother nudged me over to my dad for a dance (not a slow song) and it was the first time that I even considered he might have been expecting one, so I felt a little bad after that. I’m pretty shy so I wasn’t a big fan of even doing the first dance with DH, nevermind adding another!

What’s your situation? Are you choosing not to have a father/daughter dance, or are you unable to have one? If it’s the former then I highly recommend making sure everyone (your parents/parental figures) knows the deal beforehand so that expectations are realistic, and if it’s the latter then I really don’t think that anyone will think anything of it. 

Post # 5
Member
1266 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

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juneberries:  You should absolutely do whatever makes you happiest.

If you’re trying to think of someone to stand in mostly to continue with the tradition of dancing with a family member after the first dance, then I would be inclined to let it go and just get on the dance floor with all your loved ones at once!

If, however, there is someone in particular that plays a special role in your life that you would like to share that moment with, then you absolutely should. I’m sure either your brother or uncle would be honoured to share a special dance with you.

You honestly can’t go wrong with this one, as your guests won’t even notice. You should pick the option that makes you feel the most comfortable and happy 🙂

Post # 7
Member
1266 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

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juneberries:  Ah, I see. I didn’t even think of that since I’m not so familiar with the whole thing, sorry.

Dancing with your brother or uncle sounds like a good option then, or else you could even do a dance with your Father-In-Law if you felt comfortable with that, or he could ‘tap in’ halfway through. It could be like a warm ‘welcome to the family’ sort of gesture. 

If, however, you have some hesitations or want to avoid the whole thing, perhaps your Fiance and his mum could pick out the song for their dance and then have that play later in the evening. That way they can still share their special dance and moment, but once everyone else is dancing too, so it won’t be as big of a focus (and no one will be looking for your pairing). 

I just clicked about your last post and wanted to say that I’m really sorry you’re in this situation. I’m sure your wedding will be an amazing and special day made even sweeter by the opportunity to extend your family further. 

Post # 8
Member
2133 posts
Buzzing bee

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juneberries:  we aren’t doing a first dance or parent dances since my dad isn’t invited to the wedding either.

we are opening the dance floor by doing the “anniversary dance” 

hope this helps!

Post # 9
Member
165 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2017

My dad is extremely antomi social and has anxiety with huge groups of people. He truthfully freaks out about the whole wedding idea as a whole. Since I don’t want him freaking out and I want to make sure he shows up I’m not forcing him to dance. Walking me down the aisle is the most important thing for him. So I’m doing a dance with my mother. I’m choreographing a little quirky number to a medley from Grease

Post # 11
Member
4038 posts
Honey bee

My Dad was a great dancer. He and my Mom took professional dancing lessons years ago and belonged to a local dance club, for decades. I’m a “hug and shuffle” type of dancer. We didn’t have a Father-Daughter dance, or have anything annouced. We just posed for a photo, for the photographer.

Post # 12
Member
3323 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

My father is also not coming. We will only be doing a first dance together. If his mom wants to dance with him, the floor will be open ALL night.

TBH spotlight dances (and speeches) are the most boring for guests, so I’d rather have as few of those elements as possible.

Post # 13
Member
7881 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

We only had our first dance together as husband and wife, no dances with our opposite sex parents. I didn’t have a dance with my dad because we didn’t have time to prepare anything. If you have a male figure to dance with, you can do it that way, but you can also just leave it out. 

Post # 14
Member
180 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

Its very normal here in Australia that you have the bride and groom dance first then during the song the FOB and MOG step in and dance with the respective children. As I dont have parents I danced with Father-In-Law and hubby danced with his mum.

Post # 15
Member
1309 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

Just with my husband. My dad was dead, so…. Anyway. My brother walked me down the aisle. But I didn’t want to slow dance with him!

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