(Closed) Brides who are walking down the aisle without their father…

posted 7 years ago in Ceremony
  • poll: Who walked you down the aisle?

    My father

    My mother

    Both parents

    I walked by my sweet self

    FI walked me

    Other

  • Post # 31
    Member
    416 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    I walked myself down the aisle. Even if my dad had bothered to show up, I wouldn’t have wanted him to do it. 

    I had considered my mom walking with me, but she has health concerns and I just wanted her to enjoy herself as a guest. 

    Post # 32
    Member
    15 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: July 2015 - southern cross ranch

    I’m having my two older brothers walking me down, but my father will be in attendance. We don’t have a close relationship so I didn’t feel like he earned the right to walk me down

    Post # 33
    Member
    147 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: November 2015

    View original reply
    BurlapnLace:  Love it!

    Post # 34
    Member
    134 posts
    Blushing bee

    My nephew and I were born 3.5 months apart, and raised like siblings. I refer to him as my brother. My dad left us a week before my 7th birthday. I always wanted Andrew (my brother) to walk me down the aisle. That was the plan.

     Andrew was murdered 8 months before my wedding. I had two of my sisters walk me halfway down the aisle, to Andrew’s mom (my sister). My sister walked me to my husband, with Andrew and his brother’s names tattooed on her arm (they were murdered together). It was extremely bitter sweet. But, if Andrew couldn’t walk me down the aisle, there is no one else I would have wanted by my side than his mom.

    Post # 35
    Member
    54 posts
    Worker bee

    My father has been absent most of my life, until close to when I was in university and he decided to start paying for it. I’m super greatful, however the people who have been there the most for me through my life are my mother, grandfather and grandmother. As much as  I appreciate my dad paying for my school, he doesn’t deserve that honour. The other three actually raised me, so one of them will be walking me down the aisle. 🙂 Dad might be upset, but he can’t argue the facts.

    Post # 37
    Member
    116 posts
    Blushing bee

    My dad passed away when I was 14, my mom and I are close but to be honest, I don’t really want her walking me down the aisle, so I’ve decided to walk myself down, I’m going to get a small picture of my dad and clip it to my boquet so he’s walking down the aisle with me but it just wouldn’t feel right having anybody but him walk me down the aisle. (I was extremely close with him.)

    Post # 38
    Member
    204 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: May 2016 - Ever After Banquet Hall

    My first husband passed away a year and a half ago, leaving me a widow at the age of 38. My father gave me away in that wedding. I am now getting married again. I am having my sons (who will be 18 and 20 at that time) give me away this time. My daughter is perplexed by this, wondering why I don’t have my dad do it again. I explained he already gave me away, I’m not his anymore LOL I like it. I think it’s a symbolic gesture that they are happy with my decision to remarry.

    Post # 39
    Member
    1942 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2014

    View original reply
    Jenny905:  I am going to give you advice based on my own experience and I hope to God you take it….. only because one of the most important moments of my life is now tainted and I will no longer get it back. All of that, due to “appearances”.

    If you don’t want your dad to walk you down, don’t do it for appearances alone. Because every time you see one of those pictures, you WILL regret your decision. 

    I had my stepdad walk me down the aisle even though I always knew he was a pice of shit (I could always read right through him and even though he raised me, I kept my distance), I did this for my mom and because we had 480 guests watching. We wanted it to appear “perfect” even though he had been mentally abusing my mom for years (little did I know…). He dumped my mother a week after we got back from our honeymoon for some ugly ass woman he had been dating for almost a year, and stole all my mom’s money right before he kicked her to the curb. 14 year marriage. 

    Now I get to have a memory of walking down the aisle next to this asshole whom deserves what karma has in store for him and more. It is on my video, it is all over my photo album…. everywhere. Believe you don’t want that. 

    So please, do yourself a favor and do what YOU want to do. 

    Post # 40
    Member
    145 posts
    Blushing bee

     I have been trying to figure out what to do about this. This is my second marriage and I walked down the aisle by myself the first time, but I wanted to do something different this time. I hadn’t even thought of walking with my fiancé.

    I will have to ask him what he thinks. He has a super close relationship with his folks so he may want his parents to escort him.

    I don’t know why but it feels weird to do exactly the same as before when my family was there to see it all. But I don’t like what the tradition implies about gender roles and all that. I don’t have a bad relationship with my dad, just not great, but it’s better now than it was the first time. But I feel like I can’t ask him now if I didn’t ask the first time. Ugh it’s all so complicated

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