(Closed) Brides with no dad in the picture: Who walked you down the aisle?

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Who walked/will walk you down the aisle?
    Mom : (29 votes)
    39 %
    Brother : (9 votes)
    12 %
    Grandpa : (6 votes)
    8 %
    Uncle : (5 votes)
    7 %
    Cousin : (0 votes)
    Friend/bridesmaid/MOH : (0 votes)
    Groom : (1 votes)
    1 %
    Myself : (20 votes)
    27 %
    Sister/Aunt/Grandmother/family friend/Other : (5 votes)
    7 %
  • Post # 31
    Member
    3051 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2015

    I’m voting on behalf of my Fiance. Her mom is walking her down

    Post # 32
    Member
    1633 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    My dad is in my life, but declined to come to my wedding. I walked by myself. However, I love the idea of the bride and groom walking into together down the aisle or the groom meeting his bride halfway.

    Post # 34
    Member
    92 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    Daizy914:  +1 and my mother was so honored when I told her. She is now having a harder time picking her dress than I did. I think it’s cute. 

    Post # 35
    Member
    1850 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I don’t talk to my dad, and he was not invited to the wedding. I was going to walk myself as I hate the notion of being “given away”, but my grandfather really had his mind made up that he wanted to walk me. I thought it was sweet he was so adamant about it, and now I’m really happy he did. 

    Post # 35
    Member
    2523 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    I’m lucky to have both my parents still alive, so I might not be much help, but I think a wedding should be a happy occassion.  It is nice to remember those important to us who are only with us in spirit, but it shouldn’t feel like a memorial.  A wedding is the start of something new.  Based on the way you describe the possibilities, I feel like you might think anyone else that walks you down that aisle would be just a replacement for your dad, and that might make you sad on your wedding day (when most brides are already emotional).  I could see your mother, because it is clear that she would not be a “father role replacement,” but if it doesn’t feel right than maybe it isn’t.  Honestly I might choose the groom.  It would be perfect to start the wedding representing your new life together with the man in your life.  If you still want that surprise moment, enter through the doors by yourself and have your groom greet at the start of the aisle. 

    Post # 36
    Member
    329 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    My dad passed away suddenly a couple months before my wedding. My mom and I were having a rough spot at the time (long story), plus she already had a role in the wedding with the unity candle.  I could’ve asked my dad’s brother, but his own daughter had just gotten engaged and I didn’t want to take that moment from the 2 of them.  My mom is still pissed I didn’t ask my stepdad, but we’re just not close.

    In the end, I asked my brother, which felt like a long shot because he has some social anxiety issues and tends to avoid crowds (that’s why he wasn’t in the wedding in the first place; we’d asked him to be a groomsman but he wasn’t comfortable with it).  He shocked all of us and said yes, and in the end it was the right choice for us.  We’d just been through so much losing our dad (he’s my only sibling), he was really the only one I could’ve pictured sharing that moment with.  We’d never been super close growing up, but I think sharing that experience and that moment brought us a lot closer, and I’m glad it worked out the way it did.

    Post # 38
    Member
    53 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    StuporDuck:  My mom will be walking me down the aisle!

    Post # 39
    Member
    13 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: September 2014 - Wheeler Historic Farm.

    I’m going to have my Grandpa walk me down the aisle. He’s been my favorite and the absolute best father figure and Grandpa I could have ever asked for. He’s in his late-mid 80’s, and if for some god-forbidden reason he can’t do it himself, then it will be my mom. We are so very close and She’s the most amazing woman I have ever met(I may be biased towards both but I don’t care). I agree that you should do whatever makes you happy and feels right.

    Post # 40
    Member
    70 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: June 2014 - Dunes House - Hilton Head Island, SC

    I voted “myself” since other than my aunt, none of the older adults who really had a hand in me growing up are alive, and I just feel weird about having my aunt walk me down the aisle. (I don’t know why.) Do what’s right for you and don’t let other people’s judgments sway your decision.

    Post # 41
    Member
    963 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2015 - On a Cliff Overlooking the Bay, Florida

    My Uncle is walking me down the isle. My father walked out on my mom after 34 years and my Uncle has been like a father ever since he left.  My uncle actually cried when I asked him he said he would be honored to step up for my special day.

    Post # 42
    Member
    374 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    My dad died when I was 3 and I’m an only child from quite a small family. I really didn’t know what to do about the walking down the aisle situation – I thought about doing it on my own but I just kind of felt like it might be a too intense for me as we had a fairly large wedding (110 guests) who all came to the ceramony so I felt that I wanted a little support!

    In the end I asked my dad’s best friend who had been best man at his wedding. I could tell it meant so much to him and he was so good on the day at keeping me calm, cracking jokes and chatting with my BM’s and flower girls. He wasn’t involved in the ceramony in any other way apart from walking me down the aisle and the vicar kept out the part about ‘who brings this woman to be married’ etc. Also I gave a speech at the wedding in my dad’s place so I like to think that I somehow ‘shared’ the role of father of the bride as I didn’t want it to feel like one person had replaced him.

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