(Closed) Brides with out-of-state BM's..please give me some advice!!

posted 9 years ago in Dress
Post # 17
879 posts
Busy bee

I’m in this kind of situation and have been on the other side of it as well.  When I was a Bridesmaid or Best Man in my brother and sister-in-law’s wedding, I was living in FL and they were living in MA.  I couldn’t go up to try dresses on with her.  She ended up picking out a style at David’s Bridal for all of the bridesmaids to wear and it worked out really well.  Since it’s a chain, I was able to find one near me and order it in the same color.

I’m still on the fence with exactly what I want to do for my own bridesmaids as they are over 1,000 miles away from me.  I’m meeting up with my Maid/Matron of Honor this weekend a few hours away to look at some dresses and hopefully we’ll be able to come up with something.  Part of me wants to go with David’s, just for the convenience and also because of their prices.  However, I have had some TERRIBLE experiences there and honestly none of their Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses seem to be standing out to me at this time.  *Sigh*

Sorry, I guess I kind of ranted a bit there and I’m not sure what advice to give as I’m not sure which way to go myself.  Just wanted to let you know there are others in the same boat!

Post # 18
2183 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2011 - Florida Aquarium

My three lived out of state. My Maid/Matron of Honor flew in to go dress shopping with, and we also looked for her. Originally I said the girls could their dresses, just in the same color, but then we found the perfect dress that I could see flattering each of them It was at Alfred Angelo, so each girl went to get measured and ordered their dress. No hassel at all. For your girls abroad, ask them to get measured and order online. It doesn’t have to be stressful 🙂

Post # 19
11226 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

I have 5 bridesmaids, two of whom live out of state, one lives an hour away (MOH), and then two live in town (although I don’t see them often). I also have a large range of sizes and am trying to keep the price point low. I originally just told them to choose their own dresses within a color and length, but they wanted more structure as far as dresses go. I ended up looking at several Chinese dress sites and am letting them pick a style from a specific fabric in a color of my choosing. Basically I just have to make sure that everyone finds a dress they like from one of the places, and then we’ll get everyone’s measurements and money and I’ll place the order and have everything shipped here, since it’s really expensive. That way, I can look at all of the dresses first, and then get them to the girls and know that all of the dresses are in.

Post # 20
11535 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

I had two matrons of honor and four bridesmaids, all of whom wore exactly the same style dress, and two junior bridesmaids, who wore a different dress in the same fabric. Only two of my attendants lived local to me. All I had to do was give the girls the name and phone number of the bridal salon that was placing the order, and each attendant had to go to a bridal salon in her area to be measured. Then, each attendant (or her family member for my two juniors) needed to call in her measurements to the salon near me that was placing the order. Also, once the dresses were in, the gowns had to be shipped to some of my out-of-state attendants so that each attendant could have alterations performed by a qualified seamstress in her area. We really didn’t have any major problems.

Post # 21
6109 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

JCrew sounds like a good option!  I wore a JCrew Bridesmaid or Best Man dress in my sisters wedding.  They have many colors in the same fabric but different style.  Then they can return anything that doesn’t fit and purchase all online.  I did have to take mine to a seamstress for some minor modifications, but it was like $20.

Post # 22
2774 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I second the J. Crew suggestions.  I had out-of-state bridesmaids and that’s what we did.  All of their dresses were ordered online and they took care of any alterations on their own.

Post # 23
1836 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Floridian Belle:  what I did was choose a dress online (from modcloth, not a wedding store) and have them order it.  it has slightly backfired, though b/c one out of 4 bridesmaids has not ordered hers an it sold out, since things on modcloth are going in and out of stock all the time.  i warned them that this would happen and to please order it ASAP even though the wedding is far away, but apparently that wasn’t clear enough for the one girl…so now i have to hope it’ll come back ins tock at some point

Post # 24
423 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Floridian Belle:  I had my bridesmaids get measured locally and tell their measurements over the phone to the bridal salon their dress was at.  Then when the dress arrives, the store or my mom will ship them to the girls so their alterations can be done wherever they want.  I was going to have them buy the dress locally and get it altered wherever, but the stupid dye lot would apparently be different if that happened.  Annoying!

2/3 have theirs ordered so far.

Post # 25
307 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

My bridesmaid dresses are convertible dresses from etsy (BL Couture). We will send in the measurements and all of them will be mailed to me. That dress is very forgiving so I am not too concerned about it!

Post # 26
9129 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

I have one Bridesmaid or Best Man out of the country (UK) while the other two live within an hour or two from me.  I decided to make it easy on everyone and pick a basic style and color and let them buy the dress they want.  My directions are a white, cocktail dress (knee length or shorter), not satin or shiney material.  Other than that they can let their fashion sense and budget dictate what they buy.

Post # 27
516 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Whew! I have 2 bridesmaids out of state, and I thought that was difficult! LOL

We ordered our dresses from a custom dress maker on Etsy. I had all of the girls send me their measurements, then I forwarded to them to the Etsy seller. That way everything is handled online and shipped right to their individual houses.

Post # 28
7579 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

I have 6 BM’s and 2 are out of state. As much as I *HATE* David’s Bridal with a passion, I chose it for Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses because it was the easiest option. I took 2 of my BMs with me and tried on a few dresses. After I picked the one I liked I emailed the res of the BM’s and told them to order their dress at the DB closest to them. It gets shipped to them, and they can handle their own alterations. 

Post # 29
508 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

All four of my maids are out of state, this is what we did: looked online everywhere for a line we liked, once we did each girl picked which dress they liked out of the line. Before ordering all of them went to a bridal shop to get measured and we tried to find stores for them to visit that carried the line, if they could, they would try on the dress they had chose or one similar. After that I ordered them all together and had them sent to the centralized person (MOH) and she distributed them for me once they arrived. I paid her back for the shipping and they all paid me back for the dresses when they arrived. Each girl is doing their own tailoring and I’m leaving it up to them to take care of that. So far it’s been pretty easy, finding the dress line we liked was the hard part! Good luck!!!

Post # 30
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Mine are all out of town/out of province, but they all flew to Toronto to go bridesmaid dress shopping.

However, you can have them send you their measurements and you can order their dresses. When they come in, you can ship the dresses to them and they can take care of alterations in their home town.

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