- 5 years ago
- Wedding: November 2014
Well the wedding has been and gone and it was an absolutely magical day for my Husband and I, we shared our love, we said “I do”, we danced, we toasted, we ate and looked lovingly at each other all day. We were surrounded by so many people whom we love and adore. It was everything I had ever dreamed of and so much more – spectacular day… with absolutely no thanks to my Maid of Honour.
She really put the last nail in the coffin of our friendship. So many misdemeanours it’s ridiculous… and yes I kept track, it’s hard to forget these things on your wedding day:
1. She asked me for the run sheet I had compiled for the day and then completely ignored the whole schedule. I worked the schedule around HER so she could fit in her breast feeds of her 10 month old and so forth.
2. She showed up late to get her hair and makeup done; I’m talking 40 minutes late.
3. After paying for her dress, the astronomical fees for her dress alterations when the dress didn’t fit her 4 weeks out from the wedding, her shoes & jewellery I only asked her to pay for her hair and makeup ($150 total) and she was OK with this (she’d had plenty notice about this cost).
On the day of my wedding she shows up, gets her hair and makeup done and then tells me she cannot afford the $150 cash to pay for this and that I will need to pay for this for her too. She gave me a sob story of how they were living on credit because they put all of her husband’s salary on their home loan this month (you should have seen my Mother’s face when she heard this) I put my foot down and said “no” (I was in my bridal makeup and hair and in a dressing gown and couldn’t very well drive over to an ATM to get cash out for her). So she went and got our wedding card, opened it in front of me and said “well then I’ll have to take your $100 cash wedding gift back and you’ll have to put in the other $50 (oh it gets better!), then while we were relaxing having something to eat before getting dressed she tells my Grandmother that she’s saving up to get a boob job in the next few months!
4. During her hair appointment she was asking my gay hairdresser friend if he has ever been a drag queen and “what’s the appeal of the drag lifestyle?”. To be clear my friend doesn’t participate in the drag queen lifestyle, but he does have some friends who do (actually one of my ex-boyfriends does too… my god he looks amazing!) I was completely MORTIFIED! My hairdresser is a good friend of mine and I had to apologise to him profusely.
5. Our wedding photos during the ceremony revealed she did not smile at all through the ceremony… I am not even kidding!
6.Her husband didn’t bother coming to our ceremony. He sat in the air-conditioning of his car (at the wedding location).
7.15 minutes into our location wedding photo shoot she said she had to leave and breastfeed her child, I understood bubs got to eat. I was just lucky my husband and Brother in Law were so helpful with my massive dress and helping me get around and fixing my train and veil etc. What wonderful men they are. Here’s the kicker though… My MoH DIDN’T go and breastfeed, she went to the pre-reception canapés (showed up with her shoes in her hand and barefoot at a classy venue) and sat and had canapés with all of our other guests.
8. When we arrived for our quick wind-down drinks and canapés before entering our reception she was NOWHERE to be found. We were waiting…waiting… it came time for our entrance into the reception and she still had not arrived. I had to send the Best Man (my brother in law) around to try and find her. He found her sitting in her Husband’s car talking with him – because at this stage he had decided to show up for a free feed and an open bar.
9.Her MoH speech was a dig at how she thinks I act like a 1950’s housewife (because I complete the washing and ironing weekly and like to bake) here is her speech in entirety: http://www.j-walk.com/other/goodwife/ . It had absolutely no heart, no sentiment and was taken completely off the internet. After 17 years of friendship this was not what I had expected.
10. Her and her husband stayed until dessert was served and then they left. My MoH was the first to leave my wedding and she said to me it was because she missed her children.
The icing on the whole cake of her bulls*t was that she didn’t even once congratulate me and my Husband. Not on the day, not afterwards… never and to be honest I’m not even sure that she is happy for us.
I don’t care what people think, but this was the most important day of mine and my husband’s life and our wedding day should’ve have been all about us, lord knows we’d spent enough money to make it feel special to us and to make sure everyone that attended had an awesome time. How is it that someone can be so selfish to act like this on her so called best friend’s wedding day?
She was unbelievably selfish and let me down. I have tried for the last two months to get past it, but how do you get over someone you’ve loved for so long, someone you regarded like a sister letting you down like this? How could she be a true friend if she couldn’t even be there for me for this ONE day, the most important day in a woman’s life?
Needless to say our friendship has suffered greatly and I’m not sure we’ll ever be able to recover from this. She doesn’t believe she’s done anything wrong and that there to me is where I draw the line in the sand, I can’t handle the fact that she can’t be adult enough to admit she wasn’t there for me when I needed her. I won’t be throwing away our friendship completely, because I just can’t fathom doing this, it hurts too much to think about but I will be pulling back.
Ladies, my advice after this debacle is to make sure you can trust your MoH. After all the crap I’ve had to deal with from my MoH on the lead up to and on our wedding day I wish I had of had the courage to tell her to take a flying leap.