(Closed) Bridesmaid blues: More a headache than an honor?

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
585 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I was just a bridesmaids in my best friends wedding all i paid for was the dress, and my updo. I was her closet Maid/Matron of Honor so i completely loved it. I would do it again! She is my Matron of Honor in my wedding the 27th and i know she is excited 2! 


paying 60 for shoes when its a floor legnth dress is ridiculous! lol! i wore my wedding shoes to her wedding and shes doing the same to mine. 

Post # 4
967 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I think the major issue is the crazy brides people have to deal with!

I am REALLY trying not to be “that bride”…..My BM’s can choose their style of dress, wear whatever shoes they want (in silver or white),  have their hair and makeup in whatever way they are comfortable…..

I also don’t expect them to spend a tonne of money…..I want 1 shower (if I must have one) and don’t expect gifts–I registered for many under $30 items as well so people have cheaper options if they WANT to buy a gift….

My Maid/Matron of Honor is awesome, and loves helping me and offers….my sister and my Future Sister-In-Law are also in my party and not so much so I don’t bother them with anything…my other Bridesmaid or Best Man is in another province so we message often with info and pics of things……I’m not going to shove wedding stuff in people’s faces if they don’t want to see it…..

being a considerate bride goes a long way…..

Post # 5
6543 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’ve definitely tried not to be a crazy bride. I really haven’t required anything of my girls at all. I specifically chose a dress that wasn’t too expensive (keeping it under $150 was goal). I’m so chill that I told them they could wear whatever shoes they wanted – a) because I wanted them to wear shoes they were happy to spend money on, and b) it just wasn’t a huge deal to me. Funny enough, my Maid/Matron of Honor and another bridesmaid vetoed that and insist that all the BM’s should wear the same jewlery/shoes…lol. I left it up to them to decide what they think looks best. 🙂

I’m one of those people that doesn’t want my wedding to overpower anyone, I also rarely talk about it because I know that it’s not that important to anyone but me..haha. My girls actually are the ones who ask about it all the time, and volunteer to do things.

Post # 6
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I asked my bridesmaids to buy a dress and that was pretty much it. Anything else about their appearance that day was up to them. One of my bridesmaids threw my shower for me after extenuating circumstances arose with my grandmother and it was completely generous of her. Another of my bridesmaids I asked to be with me on the day of (very old childhood friend) and the other bridesmaids were asked to come at 4:00 for pictures. I did not have a bachelorette party, and none of my bridesmaids were around for any planning. The other times that I was in a wedding, I made the dress and showed up on time and that was it. I traveled for a friend’s wedding in Chicago once before and she actually paid for me to get my hair done, which I thought was really nice. 

Post # 7
1659 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

My bridesmaids are my best friends and my SILs who have been awesome in welcoming me to their family. All they need to do is get a dress (literally anything they want as long as it’s floral) show up at the wedding to get ready with me, and stand next to me when I say vows and get married. It makes my heart hurt when I read stories here about bridesmaids getting “fired” over stupid shit that doesn’t even have anything to do with getting married.

Post # 8
1736 posts
Bumble bee

I asked my BM’s to buy a dress, shoes and pay for their hair – but everything else is on me. They are all my best friends and my Maid/Matron of Honor is my only sister (and bestie, of course!) I don’t feel like asking them to match makes me a “crazy” bride…just a meticulous one. 🙂 I’m very laid back and I have done a lot of stuff on my own or just with my Mom and sister because it’s easier. They have been nothing but wonderful…helping with the shower and bachelorette…and I wouldn’t/couldn’t imagine ever getting to the point where they would be “fired” or I could find fault in what they have done for me. They are all so amazing! 🙂

Post # 9
679 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

I have been in 6 weddings, and not one has been a headache.  I have enjoyed every bit of it, even when inside I hated a dress or two.  I hate how tv and the media have sensationalized the wedding industry and have made every bride to look like a controlling lunatic or the bridesmaids to be narcissistic freaks.  I thnk that’s the minority.

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