(Closed) Bridesmaid BS!

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
8353 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

I am sorry you are having to go all through this. If I were you, I would just flat out tell her that I don’t appreciate her attitude and her negativity, and she is more than welcome to not be in the bridal party at all. I would also not accept her paying for the DJ. I would pay for the DJ myself. Anytime you allow people to contribute money to a wedding most of the time they seem to think they are entitled to more than they are.

Post # 4
Member
15 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Is it too late to kick her out lol? Not sure how close you are..but geez. If shes going to be like that, she doesnt have to be in the wedding! My BMS are my sisters ( only 3), and originally it was 1 sister and my 2 close friends, but the other 2 sisters complained so I changed it, and now they could care less what the hell is going on with the wedding. Sould have left it the way it is! Good luck!

Post # 5
Member
686 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I would tell her that if she wants to complain she doesn’t have to be in it at all, but that’s just me not tolerating selfish, self-centered bitches.

Post # 6
Member
7975 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

I think your sister needs to take a deep breath and tell your cousin to chill out.

Don’t get me wrong; you could do it too, but I think that would create more drama – if you throw down the whole “This wedding is about me and Fiance, not you” it gives her something else to complain about, but your sister has s better platform from which to say “it’s not about you, it’s about them!”

Also, if she’s constantly attacking your sister, it seems like it’ll be empowering/more effective if your sister can stand up for herself, you know?

Anyway, sucks that she’s being this way 🙁 and best of luck to you and your sister!

Post # 7
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Take only 1 girl and pick the dress that you want.  I had somewhat of a similiar issue with schedules.  Also all of my bridesmaids are different sizes, ranging from 4-22.  I have 6 bridesmaids.  I took my sister with me (she’s a size 10) and picked the right dress and material that will flatter everyone. 

I picked the dress below (the one on the right) for my Maid/Matron of Honor to cover her tatoo and big boobs. (she’s the size 22)

Post # 9
Member
7975 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

@Bittersweet1030: is it possible your cousin is jealous (conscious or subconscious) of you for getting married first?

Post # 10
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Bittersweet1030: Thanks!  It took endless hours of trying to match a Maid/Matron of Honor dress with the Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses that would flatter everyone, yet match in similar style, and have it by the same designer, that way the colors would match!   The designer is Bari Jay.

I like you dress as well with the ruching.  That is a must with cury BMs. I have to stress that the different type of fabric/material is big deal when all the woman are different sizes.  I hope things workout!

Post # 11
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Also, considering that you have internet available, I would look at designer styles that you like online before dragging anyone to any stores.

Post # 14
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

This is my advice.

Address it head on. Ask her what she is upset about. If she is upset about the dress, tell her she was invited to different dates, but couldnt make it. If she is upset about the style, tell her you are sorry, but its the style you want. If she is brave enough to tell you its the order, tell her that its in order of your sister and FH’s sister or random order or alphabetical or height…

Tell her you are excited about your own wedding and that she is a part of it.

Often, acting out is a result of people feeling not involved or involved in the right way and you can address that now before it effects your relationship long term.

Post # 16
Member
184 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Bittersweet1030: Just let it go unless something else comes up.  If something comes up again from her…. Address it. 

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