(Closed) Bridesmaid Dilemma

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
9673 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2019

you can choose both of them as bridesmaids, i am sure they will turn up on your wedding day ๐Ÿ™‚

it is best to have people close to you as your attendants, rather than people you aren’t close to.

and it is also fine to not have any if you don’t want ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 5
Member
9673 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2019

@Cutea:  you don’t know that for sure, but missing a time to have lunch or hang out is slightly different to your wedding day, your wedding will be the biggest day of your life, and i am sure they won’t miss it with how close you are to them ๐Ÿ™‚ 

Post # 6
Member
1460 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

If you’re already questioning whether or not they will be there then go with having no attendants.  Otherwise, you’ll worry from now until your wedding day if they’ll show up.  Do you really want to do that for the next 10 months?  It’s really not worth the stress.

 

Post # 8
Member
9673 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2019

usually the only friendship ending thing to do with bridesmaids is if you asked them and then dropped them as bridesmaids closer to the time, if you don’t ask them in the first place they shouldn’t end the friendship over it. if you say you are concerned if it will be too much for them being bridesmaids, with having to do stuff with you before hand and help you on the day, that you understand if they turn it down, they have the option of declining if they are unsure

Post # 9
Member
1460 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I would go with the cousin and other friend and not worry about the other 2 girls.  If you not asking them to be attendants ruins your friendship then it wasn’t much of a friendship on their side anyway.  Is there anything else you can ask them to do as part of the wedding?  Maybe have one do a reading and the other keeps the bride’s book or something.  Those are 2 things that if they dont show up won’t ruin things. 

Remember this is your and your groom’s day…no one elses.  ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 10
Member
2781 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I don’t see them flaking out on your wedding, but how much they are willing to help above and beyond the responsibilities of the role may be another question. You definately want girls you can rely on for the BMs and you don’t want girls you aren’t close with. Many friendships get stronger in the wedding planning process and many can ulimately end, you will find out who your true friends are.

Post # 11
Member
570 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Friendships can end over bridesmaid drama if people are immature about the whole thing. I would have a straight up conversation with them- explain all of the responsibilities of being a bridesmaid, and ask if they’re willing to commit. Then they can’t say that they didn’t realize all that they’d have to do.  Make your responsible cousin the Maid/Matron of Honor (if you have one at all), and then she can lead the pack.

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