(Closed) Bridesmaid Drama – Brown Skin tones and Purple Dresses – What should I do?

posted 9 years ago in African-American
  • poll: What Should I do?

    kick my sisters out of the wedding and leave everything the way I want it

    have the MOH wear dark purple and the bridesmaid wear the lighter shade

    Change the accent color to Black instead of Purple (because blue and green are not options)

    Other (explain below)

  • Post # 48
    Member
    63 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: June 2017

    I think this is your wedding and if they do not like it then you should take them out of the wedding. I think purple is the best color on dark skin people like me. I hate when people do not learn this is your day and do not try to conform with your vision. 

    Do what makes you happy at the end of the day.

    Post # 49
    Member
    48 posts
    Newbee

    My BMs will be in purple, as well. I was a Bridesmaid or Best Man in a friend’s wedding, and I absolutely hated the dress! LOL I didn’t tell her that though. I smiled and wore it proudly. It was HER wedding, and not mine. 

    Post # 50
    Member
    288 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2014

    It appears this issue is not about the dress.  It is about control.  Give your sisters two options: wear the dresses and accessories you as the BRIDE have selected OR not participate.  Point. Blank. Period.  If you do not draw the line in the sand, you will continue to have power struggles.  I have personally worn some of the most horrendous dresses as a bridesmaid, but I wore them gladly because I was making the bride happy.  People who cause stress, strife and drama to the bride do not deserve to stand up as her bridesmaids anyway, IMO.

    Post # 51
    Member
    126 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    I think they are forgetting the fact that this is your wedding day. They purple that Kourtney is wearing in the photo is beautiful. I also think that any royal purple will work for all the skin tones. They are making a bigger deal out of it than what it really needs to be. Tell them that this is about your happiness, they only need to wear it for one day and you hope they can see past THEIR wants to satisfy your NEEDS on your day.

    Post # 52
    Member
    4 posts
    Wannabee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    Same problem here.  I got accused by my Maid/Matron of Honor and my Bridesmaid of trying to make them look like grimace and barney bc of the shades I selected.  What I did was give them a few colors (3) and asked them to collectively decide, which one they would go with.  Let them duke it out but give them options.  I realize it sucks it is totally your wedding and ultimately your decision.  but call me crazy, but you want them to be happt and comofrtable on your wedding day because it will show in the pictures if they do not have confidence.  I was so upset and frustated and angry but it worked out well.  They picked the color sangria (Bill levkoff) designer, which is not too far off from the original color  I had wanted.  try it out….reason with them and let them see their opinion matters but you ultimately will decide, it it your wedding. 

    Post # 53
    Member
    237 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    Your wedding Your day Your rules RULE.  Get on the boat or sit on the dock.  My ladies are wearing dark purple and I DOUBLE DOG DARE someone to complain.  I am NOT a bridezilla, they get to wear their own options as long as it follows my rules (Regal Purple, Full length).  YOUR WEDDING YOUR DAY YOUR RULES.

    Post # 54
    Member
    478 posts
    Helper bee

    Are they paying for their own dresses?  If so, it might be easier for them if you buy their dresses.  Then they don’t have to feel like they have to pay money for something they don’t even like.

    Not to start nothing, but whenever I hear of people being unreasonable like this (and geez, c’mon, so what it isn’t your favorite color, it’s one day, suck it up), my first thought is the problem is really something else.

    Post # 55
    Member
    827 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I actually like purple on darker skin tones much more than lighter skin tones. I think that they need to be reminded of the fact that it’s not all about them.

    Post # 56
    Member
    2 posts
    Wannabee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    That sucks and Im sorry that your sisters feel that way. Im brownskin and my favorite color is purple too. all my brides maids dont look good in a royal purple so I decided to actually put them in different shades of purple so that I can be happy and they dont feel left out. hope all goes well!Laughing

    Post # 57
    Member
    1469 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2012

    its your wedding, do what YOU WANT!!!

    Post # 58
    Member
    720 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    It’s your wedding so they can like it or leave it! But to keep the peace I would put the Maid/Matron of Honor in the darker shade and the BMs in the lighter shade if it’s causing that much drama. But otherwise tell them to suck it up and deal! It’s you who has to look stunning on the day, not them 🙂

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