Post # 1
I picked out a dress at David’s Bridal because I have girls up the east coast that are in my wedding and it just seemed easiest. Well I picked this dress in March to give the girls plenty of time to go get fitted and ordered. I was told that the dress was ordered by my cousin in April but come to find out yesterday that she did not order it and was waiting to see if it went on sale since it was $159.00. Now david’s is saying that they are out of 14 which is the size that my cousin needs.
I know my other cousin in New York already purchased the dress and has it already because I got an email confrimation so I can’t go changing the dress I have two other girls that need to purchase this dress as well but there sizes are still avaliable. I have looked online ebay, tradsey and can’t find this dress so am I screwed? What would you do? Has anyone else been in this situation?
The dress I have picked out is style #F14867 in plum.
I was thinking maybe she could get something very similar but the only dress that is similar is style #F14865 in plum but is that to different would it look strange?
Finding a dresses for 7 girls has been an absolut nightmare I find a dress I like and its discontinued this happen 3 times I can’t take it grrr please help me 🙁
Post # 4
Can she order a 16 and have it altered down?
Post # 5
@LGenz: +1, what I was thinking.
How sold are you on this specific dress? You could have mis-matched, just in the same color, or the same dress in different shades?
Post # 6
It’s a strapless empire waist dress, easily altered. I would ask her to order the size 16.
Post # 7
@Apple_Blossom: I thought about the mismatched but I don’t know if it would look ok with the rest of the girsl because my junior bridesmaids and flower girl are matching. Then I have my maid of honor in a very specific dress but if we did two girls in one and two in the other I suppose it wouldn’t be too bad but I just didn’t want to make this more complicated.
@LGenz: How do you explain to someone that they need to order a size bigger and have it altered when they have no money? She keeps guilting me saying every wedding she has gone to the bride has paid for the bridesmaids dress. I wish I could but unfortunately I can’t afford it myself at this point we have given up our honeymoon in order to have a wedding.
Post # 8
I generally am a very compassionate and caring person who always tries to resolve issues. However, in this case, you have a bridesmaid who not only did not follow through on your specific instructions about when to order her dress but who also lied to you about having done so. If she is unable to secure the dress in a viable size (with alterations), she may have to accept the fact that her choices in this situation have, unfortunately, resulted in her not being able to serve as one of your attendants. I am not saying that you should allow your relationship to be damaged or that you should “fire” her. Instead, this is more like the case of someone who wanted to attend a concert with a group of friends but who, by waiting to see if a less-expensive ticket would become available at the last minute, may simply find herself without one.
Post # 9
@Klein2bReidy: The odds of the 14 fitting her without any alterations were slim to none. Bridesmaid dresses are made for like 6 ft tall rectangles. It sounds like she cannot afford to remain in the bridal party, is there any way you can gently suggest that if the costs are too much of a burden maybe she’d be happier attending as a guest?
Post # 11
@LGenz: +1 about the alterations. I’ve been in a few weddings and always had to get my BM dress altered (and I’m a 5’10 rectangle), as has everyone else I know. Those things just don’t fit off the rack. I seriously doubt any size she ordered would be perfect.
Also, did she actually go to the store to try on/get measured? Bridal store sizes can run weird so if she’s just going off her normal size she might not even need a 14.
Post # 12
I agree that she needs to order a size up and have it altered, or give her an out. Tell her that she has limited options and that you understand if she is not able to afford the dress, but that you hope that she can make it as a guest.
Post # 13
Thanks everyone yes she was measured but I just called the store in her location and they have the dress in her size I think she may be looking for a way out but honestly if she can’t afford it she won’t buy the dress. No dress means no wedding party and that is how I am going to handle the situation. All the girls are ordering their dress this week so I won’t have to stress about this situation and then on to the next stressful thing. I am excited to marry my best friend but I am really not enjoying this wedding thing! 🙂 I am glad I have so many bees to look to for advice!!!
Post # 14
@Klein2bReidy: Absolutely, you’ve done your part, and if she can’t afford to be in the bridal party, then that is best for everyone. It’s much more difficult to deal with the stresses when the financial issues come up later anyway, so be glad it’s happening early enough that she can opt out if need be, sad as that may be.