Post # 1
You know how we all have our dream wedding dress? Well I also have a few dream bridesmaid dresses picked out for my bridesmaids to try on. The only problem is, they are all VERY expensive designers. I know a few of my bridesmaids will have no trouble paying for the dresses, but I also have a couple who don’t make nearly as much money as the rest (two are teachers who unfortunately don’t get the kind of pay they deserve), and I feel bad expecting them to pay such a large amount of money. However, I don’t want to compromise my vision for my wedding.
My question is, do I offer to pay for the dresses just to the few that really can’t afford it, or do I offer to pay for my entire bridal party?
Post # 3
I dont think its fair to pay for some and not others. And even if you think some may be able to afford it, doesnt mean they want to spend serious cash on a dress theyll wear once.
My advice would be to find a less expensive dress.
Post # 5
If you’re paying part for one, pay part for all. I would be angry if I found out only a couple girls got help and I didn’t. Even if they can afford it, it doesn’t mean they necessarily couldn’t have used the money for something else in their lives.
I’m asking all my girls what they’re comfortable paying, individually, and covering the difference each girl says. The dresses I’ve picked are 220. If one says she’s comfortable with 200, I’ll pay the 20. If another says 150, I’ll pay the 70. I’m not telling each of them how much I’m covering for the others, but they all know I’ll be covering part.
Well, I’m doing that if we can’t find a less expensive option that I love as well.
Post # 6
Could you offer to pay for a certain dollar amount for each dress (lets say $100), to make them more affordable for everyone, then talk individually with the BM’s you are concerned about and see if they need a little more help with their dresses?
Post # 7
I think it’s very generous of you to want to pay for the dresses but unless it would be kept entirely under wraps – and these things usually never are – that some got the dress given to them and some had to pay, I wouldn’t. I would try to find a very similar dress that is less expensive. And the bee is always here to help with suggestions and opinions! 🙂
ETA: I really like the above idea for the bridesmaids to all find a budget they agree to and then for you to pay the difference for each one. For some that may be more and for others that may mean less. I offered to do this with my bridesmaids when my dress was $162 and I knew that was a lot of them. In the end they didn’t take me up on the offer but I think that is a fantastic idea.
Post # 8
Talk to the girls individually and find out their budgets (don’t mention the dream dress or its price until you know their number). Then you have two options:
1. Offer to pay the difference between their budget and the dream dress (which might cause drama between the brides who don’t have the money and the ones that do)
2. Find a dress that is less expensive than the lowest budget.
Prepare yourself that you might have to shell out a lot of money depending on how much the dress costs (out of curiosity, how much exactly?) or lose some girls as bridesmaids if you don’t want to pay the difference or give up the dress. I wouldn’t be a bridesmaid for even my sister if she asked me to pay 500 dollars for a dress.
Post # 9
I had a couple that I knew were in tighter financial situation, so I asked all to pay $85 and I got the rest – for some that was more than others due to the tallness of my Bridal Party 🙂
Post # 10
@Mrs. Bear Cheese Pie:
I think that is a great idea on your part.
Post # 11
- Wedding: July 2012 - Muckenthaler Cultural Center
I’m a teacher and I chose Coren Moore dresses for my girls! I too was worried about how pricey they were so I pitched in $100 towards each of their dresses as part of their thank you gift.
I’m in 2 weddings this summer and one of the dresses I purchased was $270 and I didn’t flinch! When I was asked to be in their weddings I expected there to large costs and planned for it!
Post # 12
Okay, this will probably sound ridiculous to many of you, but my two top dresses are $615 and $770 each. I’ve tried searching for cheaper alternatives, but haven’t been successful.
I will most likely end up paying for all of my bridesmaids to avoid any hard feelings. It seems like the right thing to do considering the cost.
Post # 13
Girl, if you can afford to buy all your BMs $700 dresses, more power to you.
Can we see a photo? I’m curious as to what a dream bridesmaids dress looks like!
Post # 14
@KelsieLea7: I’m sorry, but if I was in a wedding and the dress to be purchased was over $300 I would have to regretfully step down from my duties as a bridesmaid. There are TONS of dresses out there in various colors and styles…
If price continues to be an issue, you could always look into having them made by a seamstress, it would probably cost less too!!
Post # 16
I’m sooo happy someone posted this!
I have one dream bridesmaids dress in mind also and of course all people’s finances are not created equal so that was a concern of mine in the back of my mind. In addition to the fact that my girls are all shapes and sizes and not everyone may look good or feel good in my dream dress, ugh!
I have a few back up options just in case I am forced to compromise.
However, I digress, I love love love all the suggestions posted on here and will be mulling them over to determine which will be best when I approach bridesmaids with my dream dress for them.
I too would like for you to post pics of the dresses.
Just out of curiousity…