Post # 17
BabeMuneca– have you asked them to help with anything wedding related or have you waited for them to offer assitance? Have any of them been bridesmaids before? And if they’ve been unhelpful, have you let them know how you feel?
Post # 18
Originally I had wanted to pay for my Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses but once I got around to looking and also figuring the budget I realized that I was goign to have to go super cheap on the dresses in order to get something we could afford (since we have seven girls). So I asked the girls to pay for their own dresses (my choice of dress, but I ran every option by them so they could veto) and shoes (but i said they could wear any shoe they wanted except flip flops and sneakers that matched the dress).
They also are going to pay for their own accomdation but I hope that I can find a resonable hotel for them and then have a lot of them share rooms to help keep the costs down. Hair and make-up is on me, plus their gifts. And then of course Rehearsal Dinner and day of food and whatnot is all on me.
I feel bad asking them for so much but they all said it was fine! I’ve offered to help anyone with some travel expesnses…as much as we can but they’ve all said no need! I have such wonderful friends!
Post # 19
Each of my brdiesmaids paid for her own dress (except our parents paid for my sisters’ dresses and his sister’s dress), which was $165. I indicated what color shoe I wanted them to wear, but left they style completely up to them (and I knew that at least half of them already had shoes in that color). I also gave them the option of having their hair done professionally- some chose to, and some did not. Included in their attendant gifts was a necklace to wear to the wedding; they could wear whatever earrings they would like. One bridesmaid also flew in for the occasion, so she had that expense, unfortunately (I would have loved to have paid her way, but I honestly couldn’t afford to, and if we had, we would have had to pay for attendents on my husbands side, too). No one needed hotel accomodations or anything like that. That’s about it. My family and honor attendents paid for my shower, and everyone at the bachelorette party chipped in for dinner.
In a wedding I was in recently, I paid for my dress, shoes, and hair, in addition to travel expenses and hotel. I also paid for the majority of the shower and some of the bachelorette party.
Post # 20
We’ve got 11 months to go, so this is subject to change, but…
I was planning to let them pick any tea/knee length dress is any pastel-ish colour they liked, but they’ve decided amongst themselves to get matching ones. I’m kind of hoping they cave on either the colour or the style, as I’m trying to avoid the whole matchy-matchy deal 😛
I was figuring if they picked the dress, the colour, the whole she-bang, they could pay as there was a really good chance they’d wear them again but I guess if they go the matching option it will be less likely and I’ll chip in 50% or so. The girls are all gainfully employed but either have kids, home loans or both, so I don’t want to put to much pressure on their personal budgets. Argh! They can all get their own shoes, whatever they like with their dress is fine.
They all live locally so travel and accomodation shouldn’t be an issue, I might splurge on a hotel room for the night before so that we can have a slumber party or something.
So I’m planning to pay for:
- Up to 50% of their dress costs
- Mehndi (if they wish to participate, it lasts for ~1-2 weeks so it’s their call)
- Hotel the night before (maybe)
Post # 21
Umm, apologies for the essay. Guess I was working it out as I went 😛
Post # 22
I’m paying for my lone bridesmaid’s dress ($250), wrap (a beaded silk organza shawl that I’m having made and doing the beading on), hair and makeup (plus makeup brushes). She’ll pay for her shoes and hotel, and the dress alterations. The dress is a Nicole Miller from Nordstrom that she adores and will wear again. The makeup I’ll get for her, and do myself. I’m doing my own makeup, too (paid for a makeup lesson and boy was it worth it!). She’ll get to keep her makeup and use it for the coming six months or a year, however long it lasts. That and the brushes are her gift, along with some earrings I’m making.
Post # 23
I’m buying dresses, hair, makeup and possibly shoes. i have 8 bridesmaids and went expensive on the dresses (325), so i felt buing them was the right thing to do- plus I’m a control freak and felt this was the best way to get exactly what I want. they are in charge of accomodations, shoes and alterations. I’ll be doing gifts for them as well.
Post # 24
I only had one, and I told her to do whatever she wanted for her own hair, jewelry, makeup, and shoes. She has a pretty extensive collection of shoes and jewelry, so I didn’t feel the need to have her buy something else. For her dress, I paid for the rest after a certain amount. This allowed her to stay within her budget and allowed me to find a dress that matched.
Post # 25
i plan for the bms (possibly 6) to buy their own gowns.
they can wear whatever shoe they want, whatever jewelry they want.
there wont be any pro makeup and getting their hair done with be optional. so will nails and that kind of stuff.
i plan to buy them individualized gifts. not sure what the budget for that will be or if i will stick with the same amt for each girl.
Post # 26
I am paying for not one but TWO dresses per BMs (I on;y have 2 BMs) b/c in my culture it is inconvenient for a person to be your BMs so we do our best to pay for everything. Also since we do pay for all of it most brides will not go to the length of having more than 2 BMs. Sometimes I feel that the expectation and cost of being a BMs leans certain people into the "bad behavior" zone which causes most brides to go nuts.
Post # 27
All my Bridesmaid or Best Man will be flying in from out of town and I know it will be expensive for them (flights to California in mid july?!). So we’re paying for their dresses (midnight in any silhouette from Aria) and I’ll let them wear any silver-colored shoe they want. As someone said above, my Bridesmaid or Best Man are all naturally stunning and I wouldn’t want them to look like anything other than themselves on our wedding day, so hair/makeup is DIY. I’ll be getting them 1154 Lill bags full of goodies for their presents, but I agree with someone who said that I don’t see jewelry/clutch/wrap as a real "gift" since it’s just another accessory for the wedding.
Post # 28
My bridesmaids are paying for their dresses, makeup and other expenses. I am trying to make everything affordable so that it would be easy on everyone’s pocket.
Post # 29
I paid for my 6 Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses, shoes, wraps, and jewelry. They threw me a shower and we will be going to Mexico for my bachelorette party. Hair and makeup will be paid by them, and optional. I figure they might not wear the dress again so I wanted to pay for their wardrobe on the wedding day.
Post # 30
I understand – 2 of my Bridesmaid or Best Man were grad students and 2 others were undergrads while the other two were working. They paid for their own dress (however, for two of them, I ended up paying for their dresses kinda as a birthday gift for them so they had one less thing to worry about). They paid for their own shoes (actually, I didn’t really care about shoes and they could wear old ones since the dress was floor length anyway) – I think that only one of them ended up buying new shoes for the wedding.
I paid for their hair and makeup. I also paid for a manicure/pedicure (the girls insisted on tipping) And as part of my gift, I got them clutches and jewelry. However they threw me an amazing bachelorette weekend in Vegas where I felt that we had first class treatment and felt spoiled to the nth degree.
As for stay – I paid for their hotel stay but they did have to fly/drive out to Vegas for the bachelorette and half of them did have to fly to Chicago from all over the country.
Post # 31
my BMs paid for their dress & shoes of their choice, and any hair or makeup they’re getting done.
they’re free to wear whatever jewelry they feel gorgeous in – i dont really have a "madate" for that.
we’re paying for their hotel stay for the weekend