(Closed) Bridesmaid hair etiquette?

posted 10 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
754 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2008

I would say that if you are requiring your girls to get their hair done, you should pay.  If they have the option of doing their own or going to your salon, they can pay.  You might be surprised that most of them will to opt to have their done and pay for it themselves.

Post # 4
400 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

If you want them to get their hair done, you need to pay. If it is optional, they need to pay. I’m not paying for my girls, but they can do it if they want. They’re all doing it, so they’re paying. it’s their choice.

Post # 5
278 posts
Helper bee

I don’t think you NEED to pay but I can imagine it’s an uncomfortable situation if it was mandatory and they didn’t have a choice. I think it’s better that the choice is theirs – perhaps one or some of them would rather do it themselves.

Post # 6
180 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2009

I am also giving the option of my stylist doing the BM’s hair. If they want their hair done, they will pay the $50 each she charges. If not, I am fine with that as well. The key with budget constraints is to be flexible!

 ps – same with make-up

Post # 7
36 posts
  • Wedding: July 2009

I think it’s okay with the way you’re handling it. Being upfront about the cost – and that it is out of your budget – and that you had planned to pay will be appreciated. Making it clear that it’s perfectly fine to not have their hair done if they don’t want to pay will make things less awkward. If you’re worried about anyone feeling left out, maybe you could plan a light breakfast all together before those of you getting your hair done leave for that.  I’ve been in weddings where both has been done (they required it, but paid for it as well as the bride asked us, told us the cost, and then made arrangements for those who wanted it) and both has worked out fine. Don’t forget to mention you explored cheaper options, but they were a mess!


Post # 8
2434 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2008

I think what you suggested is perfectly reasonable.

$40 isn’t exhorbitant (does it include gratuity?).  As long as you are clear with your BMs about the cost to them, and you are giving them the option of doing their own hair, I think that’s fine.

Giving them the option is the key.

Post # 10
2640 posts
Sugar bee

I agree you have the right idea.  You’re not requiring it, and because it is expensive, you would be offsetting the cost if they chose to get it done.  Sounds fair.

Post # 11
3 posts
  • Wedding: February 2011

Wow, I never thought about how costly it is to pay for everyone’s hair!  Thanks for the discussion!

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