(Closed) Bridesmaid HATES her dress… what to do… ?

posted 8 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
4385 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Yes. My Future Sister-In-Law is the same way. Honestly, don’t do anything. She’s just being silly, you said yourself that it looks great. I don’t think it’s even fair of her to complain like that to you! That is so frustrating and I’ve been there.

Post # 4
2889 posts
Sugar bee

does she feel lit would look better with alterations? If fit is not he problem, I agree that there is nothing that you can do except hope she feels differently in a few months.

Post # 5
218 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

One of my bridesmaids doesn’t like the dress I chose either.  I think it looks great on her and so do other people, so I politiely told her, “I know you don’t care for this dress, but I’m asking to wear it anyway.”  She was really good about it and asked if she could wear it for the ceremony and pictures but change for the reception; it sounded like a good compromise to me!

Post # 6
2271 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

Had the same problem with one of my BMs. I paid for her dress and was good-natured about her complaints until one day I finally said, here  is the web site, go order another one if you hate yours so much, but YOU will have to pay for it. Didn’t hear a peep after that. LOL

Post # 7
1408 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I had this happen. I paid for a dress which looked great on a Bridesmaid or Best Man, but she totally flipped out, saying it was terrible and if this was an example (it wasn’t an example but the Bridesmaid or Best Man dresss in reality!) of the kind of thing I was going to make her wear…it was nasty and ended with her dissing almost every part of my wedding planning. She dropped out of my wedding and stopped talking to me. Over a stupid dress. Frankly, i felt, if she was a real friend, that she should have sucked it up and worn the dress. She looked great in it! And that’s my advice to you- tell her you are sorry she doesn’t like the dress but that you think she looks fab in it and could she just suck it up, just this once, and wear what you want her to wear? Especially if you have or are paying for it!

Post # 8
1585 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

um… this is the time when I think bridesmaids just need to zip it.  They should be grateful that you asked them to be in the wedding and wear the dress that you chose proudly.


Post # 9
382 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

i agree with @attybride. she doesn’t have to love it. she can wear it for one day and be done with it!

Post # 10
3709 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I am not totally in love with my Maid/Matron of Honor dress. I would rather be wearing what the other BMs are but I am sucking it up and wearing the dress. It will only be for one day and then I can stuff it in the back of my closet or sell it and never have to worry about it again.

Your Bridesmaid or Best Man needs to just suck it up and wear the darn dress.

Post # 11
175 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

Get another bridesmaid to calm her down. Maybe she just has body insecurity and feels she looks bad in everything.  Maybe it’s something specific that can be fixed with alterations, or a wrap or something.  But regardless, put another bridesmaid on it, and tell her to give the unhappy bridesmaid a pep talk.  You can’t tell her yourself that she’s being unreasonable because then you come off as rude.  However, someone else can tell her “forever young really wants you to be happy, but she’s so stressed about the dress situation.  can you just deal with this dress for her sake?”

Post # 12
570 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2009

Did you buy it for her?  If so, she can handle it for one night.  If she bought it, however, that’s a different matter, and concessions may need to be made.  Ask her what you can do to help the situation.  If there is something that you’re willing to do, do it.  If not, tell her, “I”m sorry, but I just can’t.  I’m sorry you don’t like your dress.” 

Post # 13
2532 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

It sucks that she doesn’t like it but it comes with the territory!! She only has to wear it for one night (your wedding night!!) and then she can throw the thing away if she wants to! Honestly the Bridesmaid or Best Man dresses my girls are wearing I dont like very much (2 of my BMs chose the dress and I was fine with the color and fabric) and I’m sure some of my other BMs dont like the dress either, but its tough luck! Tell her you’re sorry that she has to wear the dress and that you will wear whatever monstrosity she decides to put you in for her wedding! 🙂

Post # 14
14183 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

personally i wore an incredibly unflattering “simple/elegant, a-line” dress at a wedding i was in. I looked a lot heavier than I was. But you know what? i wore it. Whatever. Maybe if I’d paid for alterations that would’ve helped, but i was cheap. Maybe the right undergarments would help your friend out. I know mine had a “waist band” cummerbund type thing on it (not made for 6 feet tall women so there was zero avoiding it) and it came under my chest, when it was supposed to be a thing on my waist. It really did look stupid. Plus we had trains and it kept yanking the dress around all night. I’m sure it looked fine to everyone else, but it is what it is. Tell your friend that after a few beers, she won’t care. I know i didn’t =]

Post # 15
3162 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

We’ve all worn dresses we hate. You know what? You keep your mouth shut to the bride about it and bitch to the other BMs. That’s the way it works. She’s broken protocol. Seriously, part of the territory of being a Bridesmaid or Best Man is just sucking it up and wearing the dress whether you hate it or not. She’s being bratty.

Post # 16
7975 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Here’s what you should do:

1. Tell her about weddingbee, and how girls come here all the time when they are worried about a dress not looking right on them.

2. Convince her to sign up and post pictures of herself (or let you post pictures for her) in the dress.

3. We will let her know how amazing she looks and boost her confidence. 🙂

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