Post # 1
I actually created a new account just to post this. This is not THE worst in terms of bridesmaids drama, but I am seeking some clarity on how to deal. I have an amazing Maid/Matron of Honor, 4 great bridesmaids and 1…not so great bridesmaid. She is THE most negative person in the world. Its like she is so unhappy in her own life that it is coming through loud in clear with all of the exiciting things happening in my life. ALL my girls have been terrific except for her. Everything has been as issue…from getting her bridesmaid dress, to being rude to my Maid/Matron of Honor (Who is also family), to just being a royal pain. Even when I told her we had booked the honeymoon..I saw her that same night, just her and I, and she never asked me once about it. She actually did not even ask me until I brought it up over a month later. The ironic thing is, I try SO hard to pump her up and boost her self confidence.
I just do not know anymore… I feel like..she is what she is..BUT HOW DO I DEAL?! How do I NOT let someone’s negativity bring me down? Its not just a wedding questions, it’s a life question. But, I am really trying hard to not let it bother me. I have so many amazing people and things happening right now..but oddly it takes ome negativity from one person to make me hurt.
Post # 3
Well your statement on her being who she is; is quite spot on.
I’ve had friends like that before. It’s such a pain but you can only be a friend to them. Help her through if she asks for help. Support her from afar. Perhaps she just doesn’t know how to be happy for someone if it’s not about her. I’m not sure. If her negativity really bothers you, I should slowly distance yourself from her. Don’t kick her out of your life but don’t give her life and social outcomes control in your own life. You need to be happy in your own life and that comes first for you. When something isn’t making you happy, you have to find a new happy. Maybe not sharing every detail of your life w/ her…the less you share the less negative things she’ll have to say. If you don’t say anything and she’s just negative; it’s time to step away. She’s clearly unhappy w/ her life. Let her find her happiness.
Hope this helps. =)
Post # 4
@stella_99: I would agree with the PP that maybe you should still be her friend but from a distance. I have a friend or two that is like that also and I just distance myself from them, who needs such negativity in their life. But then maybe you could sit down and have a talk with her and see how she is doing. There could be something going on her life that you don’t know about that is affecting her attitude and behavior.
Post # 5
I’m sorry she is being so negative. It is so hard when a friend doesn’t seem happy for you! It is possible that something else is going on with her and it is causing her to be negative about your wedding. Maybe talk to her and see what is causing the negativity. If that does help, just start distancing yourself from her!