- 5 years ago
- Wedding: May 2013
Hello Gals! As I have mentioned before, I am getting married abroad-just the two of us-and then having a gathering back at home with my loved ones! So far, the planning has gone well and have done my best to make the reception back home as economical and small as possible, since we are spending the majority of our money in our around the world trip.
Even though my wedding is not “traditional” I chose bridesmaids to let them know how important they are in my life and also to have them just give me moral support. I wanted to acknowledge them in some way. I dont really expect much from them than just to root me along the way and be there for me at the reception. all i have asked is to help decorate the place with me for the reception and thats all. (I provide all of the material of course).
I went to visit one of my bridesmaid who is also my best friend who lives two hours away. She has been the least responsive when letting her know how excited I am about my trip, keeping her updated on my wedding plans such as my dress etc, however, I dont care in the end because I know thats how she is and she is going through some things I guess. She explained to me how concerned she became when I mentioned that some ppl have to get hotels (unfortunately I cant fit 20-25 ppl in my house). She explained that she noticed she is going to have to spend on hotel, making a dress (ummm I didnt even tell them what dresses to get, I told them they can wear whatever they want as long as it is summery) and that she has to rent a car. letting me know she may spend up to a 1000 dollars. She then explained that my wedding is become more extravagant than what I planned, and thought that I would end up still having a big lavish wedding here in the states, even though I plan to spend the majority of my money abroad. Basically, saying that I am doing to much. While I appreciate her honestly, I honestly do not expect her to do all these things. I basically told her that the only thing she has to worry about it to be there on that day. I dont think its my fault that she lives two hours away, or that she wants to make her dress. When it comes to it being “lavish” I am honestly doing everything DIY with the exception of some things: 1. I had to find a venue because unfortunately my family and my fiances family alone is 50 ppl. so unfortunately, I dont have a place where it can hold those ppl. 2. I have bridesmaids for the significance and principle not for the fact that I need them to slave away. I honestly have not asked anyone for anything, Im not demanding things and all I want is to have fun.
Do you guys think that she is overeacting? or that I am doing too much? Honestly, I came home feeling so bad and sad, knowing that I am not even making these demands. I just feel like some things are avoidable, I live in a different city than my family now and I cant really do anything about them coming up here and spend money. Plus, I dont think im doing anything lavish etc. (trust me, if I had a huge home and a huge backyard, it would be there). If ppl can come great, if ppl cant then thats ok too. because technically, I am already married by the time they come to the reception, I just wanted to celebrate our marriage with them.
What do you guys think?