(Closed) Bridesmaid mother of flower girl

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
1829 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Maybe I’m not up on flower girl dresses, but $160 seems outrageously expensive to me. I can understand your friend’s hesitation. At least with a bridesmaid dress, there is a possibility, however slight, that the girls can wear it again. But with a flower girl dress, that child will grow out of it in a matter of months. I understand that she should’ve ordered it for the cheaper price, but it sounds like the website you wanted to order from wasn’t legitimate. Websites don’t usually just disappear. So, I can understand why she didn’t want to order it from there. There HAS to be a happy medium between ordering it online and ordering from David’s Bridal. Check out department stores or even Etsy for some cheaper options. Have you checked out the david’s bridal outlet website? They have options in the $40-60 range I beg to differ that you don’t have enough time. 2 months is plenty of time to keep looking at department stores. Worst case scenario you could rush order from David’s Bridal. If you really insist on the expensive dress, I’d offer to split the price with her.

 

Post # 4
Member
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

Perhaps you could offer to pay for it or split it with her? I understand wanting the dress that is the perfect complement but $160 was the cost of my bridesmaid dresses and I thought that was super high even for them (adults). My flower girl borrowed her dress from my neighbor, but the dress did come from Burlington Coat Factory originally. It had pearls all along the top and a tulle skirt with pearls at the bottom. Plus I’m sure you can find some online at great websites for children or department stores. 

Post # 6
Member
3697 posts
Sugar bee

Whoah. $160 for a flower girl dress, $800 for a shower, expensive hotel, she has to buy specific shoes … ouch. Even if she isn’t on the hook for the shower, this sounds like a lot of money to expect her to lay out, and it also sounds like there’s not a lot of warm feeling and gratitude coming from you.

I’m sorry, I know you’re not going to like to hear this, but being involved in your wedding sounds like a bit of a nightmare. There are lots of cute flower girl dresses out there. Does it have to be exactly this one? If you really love it and it does have to be that one, then can you be flexible on something else, like the shoes?

It’s fine to want to have a say in how things look on your wedding day, but micromanaging all the details seems like a great way to make everyone unhappy, yourself included, and you would do well to be a little more sensitive to her budget. Ultimately, what matters most? The flower girl dress, the shoes, the wedding pictures – or the friendship?

Post # 7
Member
69 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

You want the dress – it’s your wedding – you should pay for the dress. Then you get what you want. Otherwise if you want your bridesmaid to pay for it you are going to have to listen to her opinion and get a dress she is comfortable with – it may be your wedding but it’s her money!

Post # 9
Member
1638 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@Sammy86:  I got my Flower Girl dresses from here: http://www.flowergirldressforless.com/

The came in days and were just wonderful.

 

At this point, if she is unwilling to buy anything online and if the dress does not come in on time from DB, then the Flower Girl will have to be replaced.

That’s the ultimatum to the Bridesmaid or Best Man. Tell her you need her “help” trying to figure out an option for her daughter since the dress was not purchased in a timely manner. She needs to find a dress or the Flower Girl will have to go.

Post # 12
Member
705 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 1993

I honestly think you need to calm down because you’re kind of freaking out a little bit.  We’re talking about flower girl dresses, not your dress or her dress or anything of the sort.  This is a minor detail.  You will still be married even without a flower girl in a proper dress.

Post # 13
Member
542 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

If you really want the child in a particular dress, you should have bought it from the first website that was cheaper and then followed up with the mother for reimbursement of your money.

In my case I wanted a really special dress for my Flower Girl that matched mine, so I just bought it myself. I considered it part of the cost of having a fancy wedding.

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