Post # 1
Just this past weekend my fiance asked my two brothers to be his groomsmen. It surprised me. I sort of see why he did it. My fiance joined the Marines right after high school. He lost contact with a lot of high school friends and he isn’t close to any of his cousins. In 2008 he was injured in Iraq and discharged afterwards and he is disabled. He only has a few close friends.
I’m happy that he asked my brother even though I wasn’t expecting it. Now I’m start wonder if I should ask his sister to be a bridesmaid. I like and we get along well but we aren’t close. She lives a few hours away. I’m not sure whether to ask her to a Bridesmaid or Best Man or give her some other role in the weddin
Post # 3
You have to want the people that are up there wiht you to be there. I think if you want her then you should do it, but dont do it just because you feel obligated bc your Fiance asked your bros.
Post # 4
We are planning to have five people on each side. My Fiance has already asked two his friends in addition to my two brothers. One of the friends will be the best man and right now he is trying to decide who else to ask for the fifth spot. I guess I kind of feel obligated since he asked my brothers.
I have a half sister that is 10 years older than me and I don’t think I will ask her. I have figured out who will be my maid of honor but I’m still deciding on bridesmaids. I do worry about one of my friends or cousins being hurt they weren’t asked but now I’m starting to feel that there I kind of have to ask my Future Sister-In-Law because she is my FI’s only sibing and what he did for my brothers.
Post # 5
@J_Bal: I agree with organizedbride! Only ask someone if you REALLY want them in your wedding party, not just out of obligation. Its your decision who to ask and you shouldn’t feel pressured because your FH asked your brothers. If you feel comfortable with your Future Sister-In-Law and you want here up there then ask her. If you’re not comfortable with that and want to give her another role, maybe she can escort grandparents down the aisle?
Post # 6
You certainly aren’t expected to. My Fiance has a sister and I didn’t ask her to be in the wedding at all.
Post # 7
I’m all about having family up there. Friends come and go, but family is forever! Even if you don’t like them 🙂
Post # 8
My Fiance and I actually discussed our bridal party options together. Of course, I picked mine and he picked his but there were a few exceptions. Such as…
I wanted to have a good friend besides me but the best man is my friends ex Boyfriend or Best Friend (total drama-fest not going into it) That wouldn’t make for a civil situation. So we decided together it wasn’t a good idea to have her in the wedding partyand just decided to keep the best man as is.
Second… it was really important to Fiance to have his sisters in the wedding and he voiced that. He didn’t put pressure on me… I just asked him if it was something he really wanted. I’m not toooo traditional but I don’t like the idea of them standing by his side in bridesmaid dresses. So they are standing by my side. I am close to my FSIL’s though so it just feels right. We call each other sista’s!
But you are not obligated to have anyone stand by your side. If you think it’s important to your Fiance to have his sis in both of your wedding, then go for it.
Post # 9
I am going to talk to my Fiance about this later on. I think if I don’t have her as Bridesmaid or Best Man, I’ll find another role for her. I like the suggestion for escorting the grandparents like Stammie16 mentioned but none of our surviving grandparents will be at the wedding. I only have one grandma alive and she lives in Puerto Rico with my stepgrandfather and he isn’t doing well health wise. So they aren’t attending the wedding. Both of my FI’s paternal grandparents are still alive but they are in bad health and are in nursing homes.