(Closed) Bridesmaid or Other role for FSIL

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1041 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

My Future Sister-In-Law is a Bridesmaid or Best Man. We aren’t very close, but we get along great and I figured it would be a good way to start out with my new family. Future Mother-In-Law said she would totally understand if I didn’t ask Future Sister-In-Law to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man, though. You might try talking to Future Mother-In-Law or Future Sister-In-Law about it just to gauge how important it is to Future Sister-In-Law to be in the wedding.

Post # 4
Member
1398 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

We are having my FIs two sisters do the readings during the ceremony. I feel like that is a nice role to give them, if you are not able to have them as bridesmaids.

Post # 5
Member
213 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

My two Future Sister-In-Law are bridesmaids… we really feel like for our wedding the main point is for our marraige, and secondly to join our families.  We felt a good way to merge families is to fully incorporate them in the ceremony.  That was our reasoning. You really have to commit to it if you are going to have her as a bridesmaid, but you also have to look at how she may feel if she’s not.  She is your FI’s sister. She’s known him forever.  Think of how she would feel if you asked her to be a bridesmaid vs not.  It may be worth it to have her as a bridesmaid- she will be in your life forever, and while you may not be really close now- in 5 to 10 years you very well may be. 

 

Post # 6
Member
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

We are having my Future Sister-In-Law do a reading during the ceremony and my brothers are acting as ushers. If my Fiance had asked my brothers to be groomsmen, I have 3 brothers so that was highly unlikely, but if he did I probably would have asked his sister to be a bridesmaid.

Post # 7
Member
2584 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I asked my Future Sister-In-Law to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man even though I’m not really close to her- I really don’t know her all that well but we get along well enough. The look on her face when I asked her made the whole thing worth it! I could tell she didn’t really expect to be asked but was really honored that I did. I feel like it can be a bonding experience and since I’m an only child, that was pretty important to me. I don’t think it’s necessary though, and I think giving her another role would be okay too if you’d prefer.

Post # 8
Member
1046 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I’m asking Future Sister-In-Law to be mine- but my Fiance is not asking any of my brothers.  Also, my brother’s Fiance didn’t ask me to be a Bridesmaid or Best Man.  All of these relationships are ‘get along’ status, but none of them are ‘close’. So  I guess it might come down to a numbers game, if you need to shore up a Bridesmaid or Best Man or Groomsmen number…add or delete a ‘moderately close’ future family member.

Post # 9
Member
604 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@murmur: I totally agree with you on that one.

Post # 10
Member
528 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

My Future Sister-In-Law is a bridesmaid and I was her bridesmaid a  year and a half before me and Fiance even got engaged. (I was so happy that they obviously thought we were for keeps, or else they’d fear the ex being in all the wedding pics lol) Although before me and Fiance got together, me and his sister were good friends when we were really little, so there was a background there.

I think even if you aren’t that close, her being a Bridesmaid or Best Man would be a fantastic opportunity to change that. I think your Fiance would be really pleased, considering he included your brothers in the bridal party, couldn’t hurt, right?!

Post # 11
Member
112 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Originally I wasn’t planning on having FSILs in my bridal party, but the more I have thought about it, the more I feel like I should.  Friends can come and go, but they will always be his sisters.  I also feel like Future Mother-In-Law expects it, and while I know I shouldn’t do something just because someone else wants it, I also don’t want to make waves over something that ultimately isn’t that big of a deal.

Post # 12
Member
606 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I’m planning on asking my Future Sister-In-Law. I don’t have a sister and neither does she… I don’t know her that well but I see it as a good opportunity for both of us to get to know eachother better and bond over the planning. Good luck with the decision!

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