(Closed) Bridesmaid speech!

posted 4 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 2
583 posts
Busy bee

That is pretty weird, and from a planning perspective, pretty time consuming!  Guests will no doubt get bored and restless.  Speaking from experience, I’m wondering if the bride would even notice if you make a toast instead of a speech?  I doubt she’ll be counting the time!  You may even want to get together with the other bridesmaids (not MOH) and see if they want to do a joint speech.  I just coordinated my cousin’s wedding and 2 bridesmaids did a speech together and it was great!

Post # 3
1150 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2015

Integrand55:  I’ve seen the whole bridal party do speeches so it doesn’t seem weird to me, although it is odd to spring it on you last minute!

Keep it short and sweet (better for you and the guests!) If you’re a naturally funny person, throw a few funny anecdotes in there, if not, take a more heartfelt approach.

Four minutes is actually quite a long time, I highly doubt the bride will be timing you so she probably won’t even notice if you cut it down just a little 😉


Post # 4
1241 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

So strange!  Plus, 4 minutes is long before even considering how many people have to talk!  I was Maid/Matron of Honor a couple weeks ago and only did 3 minutes!

I’d just introduce yourself/how you know eachother, try to share a cute/funny story, say how great the bride is, how happy your are for them and toast.  Done.  Likely under 4 minutes with will probably be to the pleasure of the wedding guests.

Post # 5
7673 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Integrand55:  How many bridesmaids (including MOH) are there? If there are more than 2, then this is going to get way too long. Also it’s not fair to only give you 2 days’ notice. Is it possible to talk some sense into the bride, that this isn’t a great idea? Or just flat out refuse, pointing out there will be plenty of speeches anyway? She can hardly kick you out now – they just skip over you in the speeches, easy.

Otherwise, like RedWine13:   suggests, stories work best, because they’re easier and more natural to tell. Quick introduction and a cute/funny story. Especially if it’s from a time only you know the bride (e.g. middle school or wherever). And whatever you do, don’t make the story involve another boy. It should be funny and a little embarassing, but not scandalous.

Post # 7
13287 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

That’s absurd — she has eight people giving toasts, at four minutes each?  As a guest, I’d be ignoring them, quietly chatting at my table if I was in the back, drinking, or eating during the thirty-two minutes of proposed speeches.

Do a quick toast.   All the guests will thank you!

Post # 8
1000 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

Agreed with the previous posters – the best way to: 

a) speed things up for the benefit of everyone attending the wedding, and

b) say something that you can get through pretty easily

is to make a short toast. Just a couple sentences about how much you love her, how happy you are for them, and then just raise your glass and toast it up.

  • This reply was modified 4 years ago by  geneva2.
Post # 10
1000 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

Integrand55:  Ooh, one thing though. It’s possible the entire wedding party also just got this memo. Communicate with them and make sure you don’t ALL do the same toast. If you all had the same thing in mind, then maybe suggest to get up all together and say something nice and scripted together, short still (maybe 4 minutes total all together) and ending in a toast.

Post # 12
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

Lurkers – this is why you don’t ask people to give speeches. If they wanted to give a toast, they would volunteer.

OP, the bride is being rude and unreasonable. No one should give a “speech” at a wedding. Speeches are for political rallies, not weddings. A toast should be no longer than two minutes. I would nod and smile politely, then give a brief toast wishing them the best. What is she going to do, stand up and demand you continue talking for another 4 minutes?

Post # 13
6110 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

Besides the point that all of her guests are going to hate life (guests rarely care about the speeches, let alone 8!), I know how it feels to hate public speaking. I was the Maid/Matron of Honor for my friend a couple weeks ago and thought I was going to die. Since your not the Maid/Matron of Honor I wouldn’t put too much emphasis on it. Just talk about how you’ve known the bride for years, she’s a wonderful person, you’re happy she found the man of her dreams, and you wish them many years of happiness. Short and sweet.

Post # 14
234 posts
Helper bee

Make as short and sweet as possible.I don’t know if I would even go 2 min. With it because there is so many people giving speeches. People get bored with speeches.

Something like they look stunning, You’re glad they picked you to be part of their day! etc etc.

Post # 15
4892 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

You could read a poem, which can be short and sweet – and very thoughtful at the same time.

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