(Closed) bridesmaid trouble

posted 10 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
514 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

What a frustrating situation!

I agree with your Maid/Matron of Honor that you should talk to her.  Otherwise you’re just going to get more resentful and frustrated about the situation.  She might not realize how much this bothers you.

Post # 4
129 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

That’s a bit disappointing.  Everyone has different priorities and in her case, her other shopping priorities come first.  If you don’t feel that she is a worthy friend, perhaps she shouldn’t be a bridesmaid?   Just be nice about it and say, if she can’t afford to be a bridesmaid, then it’s ok for her not to be a bridesmaid?

Don’t pick difficult bridesmaids.  Otherwise things will just get more complicated down the line.

Post # 5
8351 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

I agree that you need to talk to her. I would ask her if she is okay because of the medical issues and ask her if there is anything you can do for here. If she is not telling the truth, maybe she will be guilted into finding a way to pay in June/July. If she is telling the truth, maybe you can be sympathetic toward her. Also, let her know that usually only a partial deposit is required when ordering a gown and the rest is due when the gown comes in. You could also let her know that if she would like to stepdown, you would be okay with that and you would still be friends with her.

Post # 6
1147 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I agree with PP’s. You need to talk to her. Invite her out to lunch or something and ask her what’s going on and give her a bit of sympathy (not that you’re in the wrong here). Maybe she’s had something personal come up and didn’t want to get into it over e-mail (needs a hysterectomy or something along those lines). Maybe she’s having problems and maybe she made a few too many impulse buys, but you at least owe her a cursory chat before suggesting that she step down, at least in my opinion.

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