(Closed) Bridesmaid Vent – long!

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 3
753 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’m sorry she’s being difficult. I’m going to go with she is jealous because the wedding you’re having is probably the one she wanted and didn’t get. 

As far as not ruffling family feathers it sucks! At the end of the day though your wedding day should be a happy one. If she’s going to make it more stressful than happy I’d ask her to step down. 

Post # 4
2489 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

@wisher558:  Agreed, definitely sounds like she caved to her husband’s wants and lost out on what she wanted!

That, and I’ve found in my limited experience that ladies who were great bridesmaids before who then get married are just not as excited for someone else’s wedding.  Like they have a been there, done that attitude.  I know that’s not true of everyone, but it is something I’ve noticed in my life.

Post # 5
753 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@Apple_Blossom:  I’d agree with that. My Maid/Matron of Honor got married last year and had a baby this year so she just seems over it all. Like her life is already better than mine or something. it sucks 🙁

Post # 6
46408 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Mrs_Lewis2b:  I suggest you learn to ignore her remarks. You chose this  very strange character as your bridesmaid. She sounds like she is just being herself. Or, has she really changed that much since you asked her to be in your bridal party?

Post # 8
266 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

It really just sounds like jealousy, and you should just take her comments with a grain of salt.  Know that she will likely be resentful of your successes going forward as well, and if you wish to keep her as part of your wedding and part of your life, you will just have to expect her nasty comments here and there.  It will mostly die down after the wedding but it sounds like she will never be able to actually be happy for you because she’s just too envious.  Sorry you are having to deal with it, but I’d actually probably stop updating her on every little thing and just talk to your more supportive bridesmaids instead!

Post # 9
14 posts
  • Wedding: September 2013

I totally understand, My Maid/Matron of Honor has been the same way throughout this process of wedding planning. What I have learned to do was not tell her anything else about the weddding planning, how much anything cost or any big plans. It has just made it easier for me. I did have to tell her once that when she was planning her big day, I was so supportative and I never made any negative comments. Once I put everything out on the table and I stopped telling her certain things, it actually got better. I no longer want to put her out of my wedding. I know that we chose people to be in our wedding because we care about them and they are either family or special friends. But I also learned that even though they are family or special friends they are still people who have jealous tendancies. Good luck with everything and I hope that she will get better.

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