Post # 1
So when I got engaged I picked my Maid/Matron of Honor, my best girl friend of course! And my bridesman was meant to be my gay friend as well. Then he stopped talking to me for some reason….and soon so did she, or at least she was taking 5 classes and working. She always managed to find time to hang out with other people though. Whatever. I blew it off, then came my going away party as I was moving to the UK, she was too sick to come out apparently but not too sick to call into work. I would haul my ass out for that occasion for a friend no matter what condition I was in. Thats just bullshit. So she facebooked me and said merry christmas and I wrote back and said I was said that we don’t talk much anymore…..not a word. So thanks for the bachelorette party and the wedding shower but you get two big middle fingers up from me. My new year’s resolution-to make sure to give two big mental middle fingers to all those who were all “Oh Heidi we’re gonna miss you so much when you move” and then not a word after I move. Mind you I have been here since October without so much as a hello from any of my so-called friends. Oh well, I have great friends here and I married my best friend so in the end, it doesn’t really matter. Those names are crossed off my guestlist anyways :-p
Post # 3
I agree! WTH is it with some people?! I know you live like across an ocean, but I only live 4 states away. Honestly. Sorry, people really suck sometimes. At least you found out who your friends really are and you don’t have to have them in pictures 🙂
Post # 4
I’m sorry your friends aren’t talking to you as much. Unfortunately, that is what happens when you move. My husband and I moved across the country this summer and it’s pretty hard to keep in touch with people back there. I know it isn’t an excuse but people have school and work and that keeps them busy. I was full time in graduate school this fall and it kept me really busy. So maybe cut them some slack for now and try and extend an olive branch. If they keep ignoring you, then the fingers for sure. And I’m sorry about your bridesmaid and bridesman.
Post # 5
Honestly, after I”m a Bridesmaid or Best Man or Maid/Matron of Honor in someone’s wedding I do so much work with no reward leading up to and during the wedding that I just want them to disappear after they get married. Yes, I still love them. But I need a break. They had the spotlight for months and I schlepped, spent money and devoted so much time to them that I just need to be away afterwards. Finally get to spend time with other friends and do other things non-wedding related that interest me. It is the most frustrating thing ever when they don’t go on a honeymoon or come right back from the honeymoon and want to hang out. I need about a year before I can even look at pictures.
I knwo I’m not the norm, but maybe your Maid/Matron of Honor kind of felt this way a little. Not coming to your going-away is a little unacceptable unless she did something separate with you ahead of time or after since she knew she wasn’t going to make it. And moving away always = losing touch with friends. Out of sight, out of mind. Happened to me when I moved to NYC!
Post # 6
I am so sorry that you have to go through that! Hopefully you can find “new” friends where you moved to and then you can enjoy the married life!!
Post # 7
@moderndaisy: No she didn’t do anything with me before in fact the last time I saw her was the 4th of July and that is because I made a point to see her
Thank you for your input everyone and I do have awesome friends here it’s just really agitating the way some people can just dismiss you like that didn’t even know you which is what happened with my bridesman and now my Maid/Matron of Honor. Oh well, my husband is my best friend anyways 🙂 Just to clarify, we got married legally to facilitate immigration which is EXPENSIVE so we had to put off the wedding til next year. Yay two weddings lol. It’s like when your parents are divorced and you get two Christmases!