(Closed) Bridesmaid/MOH advice needed.

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
315 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 1997

I think that if she really wanted to be in your wedding party she would find transportation, public or otherwise. Although I am always a person who likes to give people a second chance and think the best of them. I think that you may need to tell her that she doesn’t need to worry about it any longer. Replace her and accept that she is just not the type to be a “active participant”.

Value her friendship for who she is and have a beautiful wedding.

Post # 4
Member
882 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

does she have to go into the store to get measured? I have maids who live in dofferent cities, and they just got measured at a local tailor (or had a friend or family member do it) and they just called their measurements in. 

If she can’t even do that for you—then yeah, it’s time to sub out your bridesmaid! 

Post # 7
Member
146 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I honestly would not order a day early.  Just in case she goes on the 1st. If you dohave to cut her I would just do it on a friendly basis.  Wedding plans have enough stress you dont want to add on more with a fight with what was a close friend. 

Post # 9
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Can she just measure herself and give you the measurements?  All she needs is a tape measure.

I really don’t think this is an issue to kick her out over.  So she hasn’t offered to help?  So what?  Its not her wedding, its yours and your FI’s. 

Post # 11
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’m sorry you feel that way.  Just once again remind her of the absolute last date she can get measured.  If she doesn’t, then she doesn’t get the dress, right?  So she has taken herself out of the wedding.  She still has until May 1, correct?  That’s Tuesday.  You think “OMG she only has until Tuesday!!”  She sees, “Its ok, I can get this done Monday or Tuesday.”

Actually asking someone to step down (even using the phrasing “I’d rather you attend as a guest”) is a potentially friendship ending move.  From your posts it sounds like you are holding against her that she has not helped you.  I will reiterate – bridesmaids are not necessarily helpers for the wedding.  They are your good friends who you want to stand up next you the day of the wedding.

Post # 13
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I see.  Then I think you might want to just try to talk to her as a friend about the changes in your relationship.  However, if you don’t think its worth salvaging at all, then there’s that.  Just remember that if she doesn’t bother to get those measurements in, then she has removed herself from the wedding, so there’s nothing more that you really need to do.

Post # 14
Member
1735 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Can you drive her there so she can get measured

 

Post # 16
Member
146 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

It sounds like she will probably not get the dress.  Then your life is easy and she took herself out of the wedding.  I have two bridesmaids that have not gotten their dress altered yet and my wedding is in 5 weeks,  My other BMs and Maid/Matron of Honor keep asking me if I am getting nervous or if this is stressing me.  I am in refusal to worry if they are not able to be part, my day will still go on.  I dont want to offend them and I dont want to lose the friendship with them. I have realized that this wedding I am planning is important to everyone but to make it perfect is really only important to me. I am sorry you have to deal with this but at the end of the day everything will work out. 

 

The topic ‘Bridesmaid/MOH advice needed.’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors