Post # 1
So I have a small-ish bridal party of 4, 2 of them living out of state, 1 living out of state half of the year and the other in state. One of the out of state girls was the last to order her dress, and to be honest I have no idea if she even ordered the correct color and fabric because emails, phone calls and texts have been going unanswered. This same bridesmaids said she ordered it so late because she “didn’t have the time or money”. Now I’m not one to tell people what to do with their money but I’ve ALWAYS listened to this Bridesmaid or Best Man tell me how she has no money, yet 6 out of 7 nights she’s out to bars and clubs. It’s her perogative to do what she wants with her money, but please don’t complain to me that you have no money to buy food.
My biggest reason for writing this is because I need to vent about the lack of communication. My Maid/Matron of Honor (sister) has been emailing, texting and calling this girl for a month now. She wants to talk to her about my bridal shower and neither of us are getting an answer from her. Yet, my facebook news feed is full of her “checking” into several bars and clubs daily. My sister has already spoken to the other 2 BM’s and just wants to talk to this one. Honestly I’m a little fed up.
And before I get some people jumping on me, I know my wedding isnt the end all be all of everyones life. My bridesmaids were ONLY asked to purchase their dress, they were given full reign over how much they wanted to spend and what it looked like as long as it was a certain color and similar fabrics. I’m not asking them for the world but I am getting really frustrated that this girl is basically ignoring myself and my sister.
Post # 3
Try phoning her instead of relying on email. Email is so much easier to ignore than a phone call.
Just touch base with her- see if there is anything going on in her life that is getting in the way of her responding, or if she may want to step out of the Bridesmaid or Best Man role.
Post # 4
It sounds like the Maid/Matron of Honor was calling…that’s really rude, to be ignoring all the attempts at contact. No advice, just sympathy!
Post # 5
@julies1949:We both were phoning…..and texting, AND emailing.
Post # 6
@ENarcy: sorry, missed that. I would send her another email and say that if I didn’t have a response I would assume that she was stepping down. I would phrase it a little more gently and caring but that would be the message.
Post # 7
Have to agree with Julies. I would e-mail her and tell her you are assuming she is not interested in being a bridesmaid anymore, so you will assume sje is not one anymore. In a nicer way thoough. Tell her if problems have ome up, or something then you understand. If she doesn’t answer your emial in a few days, then I would phone her, and leave the same message in a shortened version if she doesn’t pick up. If she doesn’t respond in a few days, then I would assume she doesn’t want to be a bridesmaids anymore, If in a few months she starts contacting you again, and talking about how she is so excited to be a brdiesmaid or whatever, or starts talking like she is still a bridesmaid, I would let her know that you tried getting a hold of her a few months back lots of time, and she never answered you, and you assumed she didn’t want to be a bridesmaid, so you have been planning things which did/do not include her, since she never got back to you.
Post # 8
Sounds like she doesn’t want to be a bridesmaid. Proceed as if she isn’t one.
Post # 9
I’m sorry to hear your having issues with someone you thought would like to be apart of such a special day. I’m in a similar situation. At this point I think I will just continue to include her in (emails or texts) but not be shocked if she doesn’t get the right dress. Good luck to you!