(Closed) Bridesmaids and a slightly hairy situation. Advice?

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
3374 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I would just say that you’re not paying for bridesmaid hair and would she like hers done or can she do it herself? Ask her if she can do her own updo. Just explain how bridesmaids get their own hair done for the wedding.I think flower girls look best with their hair blow dried and long, she should be able to do that herself.

I would be hurt if I found out that the bride paid for one girl and not the rest of us, it’s not really fair to everyone else even if she has to travel a long way.

Post # 4
Member
515 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Clark Gardens

I definitely thought this was going to discuss a foreign bridesmaid with a hairy armpit situation.

Post # 7
Member
3461 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I think best bet is to be honest with her and explain your concerns.  (Also a good time to share that you are delighted she is willing to travel from Japan, and pleased to defray her costs of being a bridesmaid by buying her dress, but as it’s traditional in the US for a bridesmaid to pay for her own attire, you would appreciate it if she didn’t share that fact with your other BMs because you don’t want to upset anyone.)  And if she is welcome at the salon as a guest rather than a customer, tell her that.

Post # 10
Member
1557 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

If I were in your situation I would offer to pay for F’s hair. If she’s spending all that money to attend your wedding, can’t you make a few sacrifices in the weeks to come so you can treat her to having her hair done with everyone? I’m guessing that she will probably already feel a little left out since she’s coming to the States for the first time and not knowing the other bridesmaids, so to leave her back while you gals all go and have some bonding time before the wedding would seem kind of mean to me. As far as the other bridesmaids are concerned, If I were a bridesmaid in your wedding and you paid for F’s hair I would completely understand and not think twice about it. You’re bridesmaids will understand the great expense F has indured to attend your special day. As far as the flower girls are concerned I would just let F do their hair or she can pay to have their hair done. Sounds like F would havbe no problem doing her girls’ hair and you guys can just explain to them that the salon appts are grown-ups only.

Post # 12
Member
1557 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Oh I missed that part of where the Flower girls would be going during the appt. I know a lot of the upscale salons don’t want kiddos running around. Though not to sound racist, but I must say some of the most well behaved kids I have ever met have been form Japan! There must be something in their water lol  So if you are frinedly with your stylist maybe you could get away with it? I also didn’t realize not everyone is getitng their hair done, if thats the case I wouldn’t really worry about. Maybe she’ll want to do her own hair anyway, I know sometimes I feel like I know what looks best on me and like to do it myself as well. That’s awesome that you have such a good friend that will travel that far for your big day!

Post # 13
Member
1144 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Whats 50 more dollars among friends? I would shell out the money. It’s really not worth all the trouble of explaining to someone.

IMO – I never do my hair up and if a bride requested me to do my hairup I would expect that she be the one to pay for my hair to get done.

Post # 16
Member
1144 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@GreenEyedMoon: Oh okay 🙂 Make sure they all know that then, including F. Is “F” cash strapped? Maybe just invite her to the salon? You could send an email out to all f them at once or something. Most will let you move a chair to where ever and be with everyone. I would feel bad if only one Bridesmaid or Best Man wasn’t with me while everyone else gets their hair done. Or maybe she won’t want to come becuase she will have her girls.

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