(Closed) Bridesmaids and bachelorette party

posted 10 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
484 posts
Helper bee

Sticky situation but I think you easily have your Maid/Matron of Honor tell B that while she totally appreciates her help, since she isn’t sure if she can make it yet, Maid/Matron of Honor will take the lead on this one. I wouldn’t say anything to B about it until  Maid/Matron of Honor tells her she isnt planning it anymore. Then ask her to do something else…just tell her how much it meant to you that she wanted to take charge but since she cant this time around would she mind doing…xyz

Since she’s out of town I would suggest asking her to take care of brunch the morning of your wedding (if you’re having an evening one). Ask her to bring mimosa’s and breakfast food to where ever you’re getting dressed.  If she’s coming into town for your shower perhaps she can take charge of an aspect of that (games, centerpeices, dessert etc).


Post # 4
796 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

B said she still wanted to plan it even though she’s not going? Maybe I’m just a bad person so I’m reading this wrong, but maybe your Maid/Matron of Honor doesn’t want to plan it and she’s trying to hand it off to B.

Post # 5
225 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I know its customary for the Maid/Matron of Honor to plan the bachelorette and shower events, but can’t they throw it together? So its not just one person planning?

I think that is what my ladies are doing (and I encourage it!) and maybe you can suggest that they work together instead of just one person take charge. And find out if your Maid/Matron of Honor minds that B is doing it, or prefers it? 

I’d be concerned, too, considering she didn’t tell you about her not being able to make it until you called her to ask. 

Maybe you can talk to B and say something like, "Thank you for planning the bachelorette for me even though you cannot make it. Even though, I hope you change your mind and decide to come. Perhaps you can share the planning with the Maid/Matron of Honor so that it will be easier, in the event you still cannot make it."

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