(Closed) Bridesmaids are avoiding me

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
8444 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2013

@Sevyn:  Hmm it doesn’t sound like you’re being overly demanding, but maybe they’re having financial troubles.  I know you told them that you’d help them with the costs, but sometimes people just get embarassed about it.  Maybe try to organize something fun like a luncheon or afternoon tea to catch up?  So sorry your girls are stressing you out like this.  *HUGS*

Post # 4
2715 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Well that sucks.  Are they normally this tough to get a hold of?

I think I would try and contact them about non-wedding related stuff. Call and say you haven’t hung out in a while and would love to catch up over coffee or lunch or something.  If your only communications have been about wedding, they might be ignoring you because they (incorrectly) don’t feel as if you care about them.  I’m not saying this is true, just trying to figure out a possible reason.

Post # 5
2297 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

wait – you haven’t heard from them/seen them since November 2012? is that correct? 

it’s April – so 5 months? if i hadn’t heard from my bridesmaids in 5 months, i would assume that (not to freak you out) they were no longer bridesmaids….there HAS to be something going on – no one is busy for 5 months and they must be aware that you are trying to contact them. 


has something happened that could have led to this? what are their reasons for no contact (if you’ve heard through someone else). i would try and drop in on them this week, stop by their work, whatever. if they’re out of town i would honestly think about heading there for the weekend. 

Post # 7
405 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

Were they this hard to get ahold of/flaky before becoming bridesmaids? If you’ve always had a hard time reaching them, then nothing has changed and you should have realzied they might be difficult to reach. If it’s a new development then they might just be avoiding you for one reason or another. It could be that they are embarrassed about not having the money for the dress, or maybe it’s something else entirely.

Have you tried calling them? If you do call and they screen you call and don’t answer, you mgiht want to leave a very explicit deadline in your email (i.e. call me back by X date and let me know what’s up, or I will assume you don’t want to be a bridesmaid anymore).

Post # 8
7208 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2015

I feel like there’s a key piece of information that is missing. If you’ve really been that chill and there haven’t been any fights or something you’re not mentioning, it doesn’t make sense at all. Either these girls are not very good friends (I mean, who doesn’t return their friend’s calls for 5 months regardless of the wedding?!) or you slept with their boyfriends or something! Honestly, I’m afraid it may be time to nix them. 5 months is a VERY long time. My best friend is getting married and we upped our communication from once or twice a week to almost daily!

Post # 9
27 posts
  • Wedding: April 2013

I agree with FionnaCake.

Give them a deadline and keep it moving. They know you’re looking for them. Of course they are behaving badly but you can’t let this ruin your wedding. So what if there aren’t ten people up at the front with you? In the end, you marrying your husband is the most important thing.


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