Bridesmaids don't like the style of dress I would like for them to wear.

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: If neither me nor the bridesmaids like the dresses the other picks, who gets to choose?
    The bride : (117 votes)
    69 %
    The bridesmaids : (52 votes)
    31 %
  • Post # 76
    Member
    2130 posts
    Buzzing bee

    I honestly don’t understand why someone would agree to be a bridesmaid then refuse to wear the chosen dress. For body/modesty reasons sure. But colour or style? 

    I would wear a sack if a bride wanted me to. I would gel my hair into a flipping Mohawk if that was the look she was going for. Because it is her wedding, and I would be on board 100%. 

    What I wouldn’t wear is anything super short or low cut. That’s all. 

    Bee, your sisters might be making this harder for the simple fact that they’re your sisters. Sometimes family can be the hardest to please. Perhaps give them your requirements (eg long, floral) and see what they come up with. They may surprise you! 

    Post # 77
    Member
    2014 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Still not clear on who is paying…

    Post # 78
    Member
    665 posts
    Busy bee

    scipioblack :  who is paying for the dresses? I say you pick the dresses and also pay for them.

    Post # 79
    Member
    7002 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Look technically when you sign up to be a bridesmaid it’s just understood you put up on the dress the bride likes and call it a day. That being said, I don’t understand why a bride is so intent on having their girls be in dresses they hate? If they are uncomfortable and don’t feel good in the dresses, it’s going to show. I just have a hard time believing that of ALL the dresses out there, a compromise couldn’t be made.

    As a wedding photographer at least 75% of my weddings the bridesmaids are dresses that they hate and are totally unflattering on at least a portion of them…all because it’s what the bride wanted. My own SIL was the *worst* when it came to picking dresses. I love her dearly but she’s been a lifelong size 2 w/ no boobs. She has no concept of what it’s like to put on a dress that doesn’t fit – everything looks good on her. 4 out of her 7 bridesmaids were all size 12-18 with D/DD chest. At first she wanted all the girls in Lilly Pulitzer dresses, most of which are not made above a 14/16 and tend to run small. The dress she then picked was a low back that NO BRA could have been worn. She finally agreed to pick the fabric/color/designer and let everyone choose a short dress that fit them best. It was the best possible option, because everyone looked good in a dress that fit their body type.

    Post # 80
    Member
    665 posts
    Busy bee

    These are the dresses they have at Ross in various colors for 20 bucks. I saw someone looking at them for bridesmaids and thought of you. If you wind up paying for everyone’s dress and really want long it can’t hurt to take a look.

    Post # 81
    Member
    665 posts
    Busy bee

    scipioblack :  that’s a really pretty dress. I would love to rock that with suede booties and vintage jewelry. what are the body types of your bridesmaids? Hmm are any of them under 5’7″? That might be the problem bc I’m 5’7″ and size 6 and would try to wear higher heels. I think the empire seam with the flowy fabric in the front is so feminine and flowy. It’s hard tho if you are shorter or are larger/busty bc sometimes that makes people look larger than they are. sorry you have to deal w this. 

    At least you aren’t like my clueless cousin who picked a near see through champagne crepe dress after having her size 0 best friend try it on and decided it looked perfect. Any ounce of cellulite showed through and her sister who was a plus size couldn’t even wear the same dress. I was 15 and could barely get away with it. The model in the catalog didn’t even look good.

    Post # 82
    Member
    488 posts
    Helper bee

    It’s difficult. I asked my sister to pick out any Alfred Angelo dress for herself, and I would pay for it and pay for any alterations. She didn’t like any of them. There are literally over 100 styles in 20+ colours. 

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