Post # 17
Yes and no. If it’s something to be used at the wedding but will be used again then I would consider it a gift. I’ve only got one bridesmaid. I plan to get her a robe, a personalized hanger and card when I ask her and get her some other gift on the wedding day. She will be getting her own dress and accessories, etc.
ETA: Every time I’ve been a Bridesmaid or Best Man I’ve gotten jewelry to wear on the wedding day.
Post # 18
I want a monogrammed robe >.<
Post # 19
how on earth can you know whether any of your friends/BMs will reuse a robe?
I think I know all my BMs quite well, but I still have no idea if they would use it again!
(I’m saying that cuz I would say that about any gift… and I’m getting mine a goodie bag with things like makeup items, flip flops, cute water bottle, etc.) Well, I guess the difference is that I’m not expecting any of those things to be used for the wedding,
But how is it different to give a bathrobe to someone, just to have, as a gift, and a bahtrobe that you know they will use at least ONCE on your wedding day?!
Post # 20
honestly, i don’t mind jewelry if it’s my style or can be worn again, regardless of whether or not it was picked for me individually or the same for all bridesmaids. i got a really nice necklace with my initial on it for being a bridesmaid, and I definitely wear that. it also does make me feel closer to the bride and I think of her when I wear it, as julie said.
that being said, i’m not usually a fan of the gifts that are wedding day specific. totes, flip flops, etc just don’t really strike me as a gift. the one that i really dislike though are the bridesmaid tanks…i’m sorry, but when am i going to wear a rhinestoned bridesmaid top again?
Post # 21
@Miss Tattoo: I agree with your Maid/Matron of Honor. While I did make all the jewelry and will be providing accessories for my bridesmaids, I did get them additional jewelry to suit their individual tastes, so they can wear it everyday.
Post # 22
@Miss Tattoo: No robes? I have at least a dozen! Never been in the hospital and took a walk? Nobody ever rang your doorbell when you weren’t dressed or in your PJ’s? Never had anybody stop by unexpectedly while you were getting dressed? I know lots of people get tons of snow in the winter…never wear a robe for extra warmth at night?
I guess this is pretty surprising to me in general.
I think if I were a Bridesmaid or Best Man I wouldn’t want a tote or lotion or any cutesy things either….
Post # 23
As a bridesmaid, I would honestly just be happy with a heartfelt card from the bride & groom. Anything beyond that is just extra.
I also don’t mind cluthes, jewlery, or even a robe. Yes, it’s technically for the wedding but I would most likely use all that stuff again (except maybe the robe, depending what it looks like).
Post # 24
For the last wedding I was in, we all got jewelry to wear for the wedding and a jewelry box with our name on it. The jewelry was fairly neutral, and I wore it again, but I hated the jewelry box (it just wasn’t in line with my taste, there were no dividers or organizers in it, and I already had enough jewelry storage space). So, even though one gift was clearly meant for the wedding/ the bride’s benefit, and the other was not, I definitely preferred the jewelry.
Post # 25
- Wedding: December 2010 - Savannah, GA
This thread is making me happy I didn’t have any bridesmaids or a MOH!
I’m sorry. I think your friend sounds a little ungrateful. I have no idea whether my friends wear robes or not, and if they do wear them, I don’t know if their robes are all tatty or not. Maybe a robe doesn’t really qualify as a token of appreciation, but robes can be expensive and are nice gifts (as long as they don’t say bridesmaid on them).
I guess I was raised differently when it comes to gifts. I was taught that anything you are given, which you didn’t have to pay for yourself, regardless of whether you like it or will use it is a gift, and you should appreciate whatever you are given. I was taught not to complain about any gift I was given also, but I’ll admit that I’ve failed in that regard a time or two; however, the person who gave me the gift never knew.
Heck my grandma gave me orange toe socks one year for Christmas. I hate the color orange and I can’t stand things between my toes, so they were something I would never ever wear. However, our school colors were orange and black, and toe socks were a novelty that year, so she thought I would like them.
I guess my thougt with the robe is, if I didn’t wear robes and didn’t have one, I’d be thankful the bride thought about my comfort and the way I looked around the photographer when we were getting ready. Otherwise I might be walking around naked or in a football jersey and be embarrassed by the pictures. Maybe I wouldn’t ever wear it again, much like those toe socks my grandma gave me, but I would thank her and be happy she gave me a thoughtful gift.
Post # 26
Big fat meh on this. I got them an earring & necklace set that could be worn again if they so wish; it’s neutral and dressy enough. I also got them a clutch – the outside fabric is damask, so goes with anything, and lined in each girls favourite colour. Oh and I’m also paying for their hair.
Honestly? It was just easier both financially and mentally to get them all the same thing. Less stress = happy bebefly.
Post # 27
- Wedding: March 2011 - Rosehall Resort, Montego Bay, Jamaica
I think it depends on the receiver of the gift. I have a friend who gave all her bridesmaids coach clutchs that not only matched their dresses but the girls were over the moon excited because they all love coach.
It depends on the girls receiving the gifts and if the gifts fit their personality/style.
Post # 28
My aunt is making girls jewelry, so its all custom and handmade.. plus she’s refusing payment from me, so I’m not paying anything. Which leaves me with room to buy them all something..but I’m at a loss as to what. Right now I think I’m going to get them all the same items.. but in prints/colors/fabrics that suit their personal taste. There’s nothing wrong with gifting them something they’ll never use again. I think most bridesmaids have come to expect jewelry they might never use again lol. Bridesmaid or Best Man A has told me repeatedly that she’s upset I’m getting her anything, she said to her the gift was being asked to be a part of my special day. But I don’t believe in not getting anything, especially if they’re paying for their own dresses etc. This is one of those issues that can go either way, depending on the bride.
Post # 29
Wow- I never even thought about gifts to wear at the wedding not being REAL gifts. I have been a bridesmaid before and gotten jewelry that I would really only wear for that wedding, but I never thought of it as not a real gift. I know that the bride put thought into it, and really, she didn’t have to buy us jewelry at all, so it’s more of a “It’s the thought that counts” no matter what the gift would be, to me. I got my bridesmaids a pumpkin colored Pashmina to wear at the ceremony, and I guess since it is kind of an offbeat color they might not wear it again, but it’s functional, and I liked it, and I would be happy to receive it as a Bridesmaid or Best Man myself. I also bought them toiletry bags from Vera Bradley, so I guess I’m covered either way. I guess I feel that if you are a Bridesmaid or Best Man, you aren’t doing it for the gift, you are doing it because you love your friend, and therefore whatever they do to show your appreciation, be it paying for your manicure, taking you out to dinner or buying you something is really just a token of appreciation.
Post # 30
Since when do items you recieve from another not qualify as a gift?????????? Regardless if it matches wedding day attire or not, the bride has spent her money and time picking it out…how ungrateful! Even if you don’t like your “gift,” it’s polite to say thank you and move on…like when you Aunt from Toledo gives you toe socks for xmas…LOL!
I got my Girls lots of goodies in tote bags I made for them on Vistaprint. Flippy Flops of course, comfy shoe pads, hand painted wine glasses, hand painted hangers and of course their wedding day jewelry. I got them freshwater pearl sets (earrings, necklace, bracelet). I also got them small black purses/clutches to use on wedding day to match their dresses, which are black. I did get my Maid/Matron of Honor a extra gift of bath and body stuff in a cool box that looks like luggage.
Post # 31
- Wedding: September 2011 - Clark Gardens
I tried to cover my bases and gave each girl $50 for her shoes, a monogrammed robe, and then another small gift that was unique to each girls’ taste. I hope they feel like I showed them I appreciate all their help with these gifts.