(Closed) Bridesmaids & MOH Choice… little family, few close friends

posted 5 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
221 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@princesscharming:  Your descriptions are great, there’s plenty of information there.

How come you mention “falling out”? Does falling out in the past matter when you and your friend are able to get past it and still hang out with each other? Has the relationhip changed after “falling out”?

After my first read thru, initial instinct was do not pick any but instead pick your sister, then I read that you are an only child. Since your wedding is going to be small (35 ppl) then I think you can go without one (4th option). But if you really want another woman to stand with you, then I would only get 1 Maid/Matron of Honor (1st option). The reason being is that I can only see one good candidate from your list. In fact, I think your gut feeling already knows who because of the way you’ve written each of the descriptions!

Would I be right? Is it Choice D? If it is, can you elaborate why you don’t just go ahead with her as at least an MOH?

I wouldn’t include M, P and A for the following reasons:


M) This is the biggest obvious NO to me.

You don’t want someone jealous, the fact that you picked up on it, it will be only time that you will resent picking her. Jealous people cannot hide it. They are the last people you want in a supportive role. What was in the phone call that made you think she might be jealous?

You said you’re not as close anymore. That’s part of life. People and consequently the nature of relationships change. The person you pick should be someone that will remain to be a part of your life in the near future. After the wedding, you will be sharing photos, talking wedding analysis, is this the person you think you can do this with? 

She’s unemployed. Sounds mean, but from reading other blogs, she sounds like a logistics problem.


A) She’s family but sounds like she’s hard work. You don’t want someone that is stubborn and self-centered. She will get on your nerves throughout wedding planning, then you’ll regret picking her and then you’ll be unhappy. If she’s bossy, forget it. Not worth the hassle.


P) She’s my second best pick for Maid/Matron of Honor. It shouldn’t bother you that she might not pick you as Bridesmaid or Best Man just because you pick her as one. Relationships are complexed and that’s that. It might be exciting to be in wedding planning mode together or it might be a disaster I don’t know. The positive is that you still hang out.


D) She’s my first pick (but P and D are very close). It just sounds like you wrote her review in a very positve way.


Again, pick someone based on if you think you will still be friends after the wedding, no jealousy or competitive streak, not too strong or overwheliming a character, and someone that you can have an argument with and still be friends after. Who can you stand the most? Least annoying, etc. 

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