(Closed) Bridesmaids now engaged and planning their weddings

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
3580 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

@jmh518:  I was lucky that I got married the same year as my best friend. We each helped each other through the process and while I got to a burn out period, I wouldn’t trade that support or the world. Look at it as an opportunity that you know have a team of experts!! 🙂

Post # 4
Member
1278 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

My bestie was recently engaged and her wedding is just 6 weeks after mine. I am her Maid/Matron of Honor. I couldnt be more excited. I think your situation sounds a little diffefent and I would just make sure to constantly check in with the girls and invite them to be part of your planning process so they remember their 1st committment to you. Good luck:)

Post # 5
Member
1430 posts
Bumble bee

well that happens to be a common problem with long engagemets. no one can be center of attention as the only bride to be for almost 2 years.  especially since you are technically married already.. just figure out what yout own wedding would mean to you at this point. if it is still really important to you then you have to stop comparing things to your friends and be happy and excited about your own wedding.

And as for feelingleft out of the planning of the other girls.. i didnt really tell friends that werent BMs about all the wedding planning detail- unless they asked. you said you didnt know about your friends dress ect for a month. i am sure if you called her and asked how the wedding planning was going and what have you gotten done then she would have told you. since your feeling a little left out by not being in their wedding how about you plan a little dinner with the brides to be where you can talk weddings and maybe watch a wedding movie for fun?

 

Post # 6
Member
594 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Do not look at it as others will not honor on your day, look at it as now you have more friends that will help you plan from the perspective of the bride. 

jealousy will take you away from your wedding and from celebrating the union of your friends. 

Like what was mentioned on here before, no one is going to be as excited about your wedding as you but that does not mean no one cares and it does not mean no one will look forward to it. 

 

Post # 7
Member
11747 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@jmh518:  as a bridesmaid i don’t think you are committing to plan someone else’s wedding. Just like your wedding is more important to you than anyone else’s wedding, their weddings are naturally more important than yours or anyone else’s to them. As a bride you get 1 day to be center of attention – your wedding day. And regardless of how manuy other weddings take place near around or on your wedding, at your own wedding you will be the center of attention. Be happy for your friends and you can all share in this great moment together.  7 yes 7 of my friends all got married in the same summer – some were in each others weddings others weren’t and it all worked out wonderfully and they had a blast planning their weddings together.  This will only be a bad experience for you if you make it such. 

Post # 8
Member
157 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

One of my bridesmaids (who will be a matron) is getting married 6 weeks before I am and although it can get competitive, I can’t imagine a better way to bond with your girlfriends than planning a wedding together.  Most bridesmaids won’t understand the insane stress a bride feels and it really helps to have other bride-to-bes next to you because they’ve been through it or are going through it themselves. 

Post # 10
Member
3152 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

@jmh518:  I’m caught up in the comment about them helping to plan. It is not their role to help you plan your wedding. That’s for you and your fiancé. Hopefully they will still want to do a shower and all that. And with 4 of them not planning their weddings you still have a good chance that all the normal things will come together. 

Your moment comes next October- it doesn’t start when you get engaged and go through the entire planning process. You really can’t expect that they put life on hold until you’re married. In reality, they will be more focused an excited for their own weddings. Your wedding is most important to you, right? I just don’t get this way of thinking. 

Post # 11
Member
3152 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

And to be honest- if I was planning a wedding at the same time as a bunch of friends you better believe I’m keeping most details to myself! It’s like a baby name- just keep your lips zipped and no one can surprise you by picking the same things as you. Work with your man and your mom and the other girls and have fun with it. 

Post # 12
Member
1038 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I don’t feel like the center attention for once- why bother spending all of this money?

 

 

Because you want to celebrate marrying the love of your life and you want to share that day with those close to you in your life? Or is being center of attention more important to you?

 

 

Post # 13
Member
467 posts
Helper bee

@kveloso:  +1

Why not tell people how you really feel?  Seriously, your friends might not be doing this on purpose.  They might be worried about boring you with the details of their weddings. 

Post # 15
Member
3152 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2018

@jmh518:  if all you want is to be the center of attention for a full 10 months, you are going to be disappointed. Maybe you shouldn’t move forward with the show of the wedding. You really do only get 1 day. The rest is a bonus. You are expecting too much. Arts and crafts day??? Make up parties? I’ve never heard of these requirements. 

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