(Closed) Bridesmaids SUCK!

posted 11 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Does bridesmaid #3 Suck???



  • Post # 3
    640 posts
    Busy bee

    My fsil just dropped out as bridesmaids 2 months before the wedding. I think sometimes people are just insensitive and don’t think about how their actions are affection others.

    Post # 4
    610 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    Well, not all bridesmaids suck. At least not two of yours.

    Although we all have wedding brains here, it is important to keep in mind that some ppl are completely unaware of what wedding or being bridesmaids entail. Nowadays, bridesmaids are also not obligated to do anything except for standing up with you the day of your wedding (& buying and/or wearing a dress). Some bridesmaids would even fail to do that. Just keep your expectations low and ask other people who may be more interested/open to help you out. Take care!

    Post # 5
    3041 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2010

    I’m sorry :(. That must be really tough! Sometimes bridesmaids don’t really know what they’re supposed to be doing. Honestly, if someone asked me to be a bridesmaid LAST year, I would’ve just assumed it meant being at the wedding, standing with the bride. If anyone ever asked me since I’m planning a wedding, I know there’s much more to it than that. Are any of them married? Maybe they don’t know how important it is to you?

    I didn’t go to one of my best friend’s weddings because I didn’t know how important it was… I took a kid I mentor to a 3 day concert instead (we had planned it for a year thou & my friend knew that). Now that I’m planning my wedding, I see that “oh I could have offered my friend help” or “maybe I should have done something else with the kid I mentor so I could go to her wedding”. Not trying to give em excuses, but maybe you just need to talk to them about it… just don’t start in an accusing “hey you’re supposed to do this for me” type way. Maybe a “it would mean SO much to me if you could make it to the shower, so if you’re other plans change, I would love it if you came”.

    Hopefully it all works out & they see how important this is to you! But, you will have plenty of friends supporting you, so don’t focus on who’s not there if they don’t come… focus on who’s there now & celebrate!! Good luck!

    Post # 6
    640 posts
    Busy bee

    Thats what I’m trying to do and it helps a lot! I keep thinking about all of the people that will be there and super excited than on the ones that aren’t. 

    Post # 7
    1336 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: March 2010

    Focus on yourself and those around you who do care and suggest that after the wedding I would say you can very sincerely let her know how disappointed you are.  Good luck with everything and best wishes!  I feel your stress, I’m a March bride too!

    Post # 8
    1260 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    I agree with others who said your “bad” Bridesmaid or Best Man likely just doesn’t know she is supposed to be giving you a hand and being a better source of support. If you have time, I would talk to her about how you feel. My Maid/Matron of Honor sort of dropped off the face of the planet for a long time, so I know how you feel. Good luck sort this out, and remember to ENJOY your wedding, regardless of those around you who aren’t as into is as you are!

    Post # 9
    1385 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    I agree with @serabell if I had realized when I was a bridesmaid in the first wedding I was in I would’ve really stepped up my game in the bridesmaid arena. But it’s hard when you’ve nopt been a bridesmaid before and don’t really understand how important it is!

    Post # 10
    168 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    I’m sorry, that stinks.  Sometimes girls that haven’t been married just don’t know what the responsibilities are of being a Bridesmaid or Best Man.  Have you asked her for specific help? 

    Maybe mention that since she can’t make it to your shower- that you’d like to have some one-on-one time before the wedding craziness starts.  Maybe she could come across the street for wine and to just hang out? 

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