(Closed) Bridesmaid’s Wedding Looks Just Like Mine … ARRRG!

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
3520 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

@hissoon2be: You know the truth, and deep down, she knows the truth too.  Just be internally smug and ignore her. 

Post # 4
Member
5761 posts
Bee Keeper

Weddings are competitions now? Ignore it and decide if this is enough to make you drop the friendship. It wouldn’t be for me, tho.

Post # 5
Member
1880 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@hissoon2be: At my age and given the ridiculous drama some “friends” have tried to inflict on me, I would be inclined to just step away now before it gets out of control.  But that’s just me.  Jealousy, tit-for-tat, etc. is just annoying and immature and if that’s what your friend is about, save yourself the hassle and your friendship and just fade into the background until her wedding is over.

Are you one of her bridesmaid’s?

Post # 7
Member
1880 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@hissoon2be: I know you mentioned that she is the queen of denial, but can you maybe talk to her one more time and let her know that you are uncomfortable with this air of competition that she seems to be fostering?  Look, I just know from experience that these situations rarely get better.  I don’t know your relationship so i can’t judge it, but from my own past, friends that are openly competitve with you like that (and then deny it when you actually call them out on it) are usually not your TRUE friends.  Again, only you can judge that for yourself.  I’m just giving you my 2 cents.  Try talking to her again.  If that doesn’t work and her behavior gets worse, do what is right for you.  Good luck.

Post # 8
Member
1231 posts
Bumble bee

Well, are you willing to deal with it for another 5,6 months? Fall is pretty far off and my guess is this “my wedding is better but I won’t tell you, i’ll just tell others who will tell you and make you mad” game will continue on well after the wedding. That just sounds tedious. I would drop out now while you can instead of waiting until the bachelorette party where she’s drunk and telling you how much better her bridal experience is than yours. (i’m a psychic i can see this happening lol)

In the end its up to you, but that behavior would get real old fast for me and at some point would come to a head.

Post # 9
Member
1880 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@MissCallieJean: I totally agree with you.  Get out now.  It will only get worse.

Post # 10
Member
5761 posts
Bee Keeper

I’d actually be questioning the other BMs or ‘friends’ who feel the need to tell you this. Why would they do that? It all sounds so juvenile.

Post # 12
Member
827 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Imitation is the greatest form of flattery, hah.  Honestly, I would approach her, say that this whole situation is making you feel uncomfortable, and if she acts all weird about it, drop out of the wedding.  It isn’t worth your sanity. 

Post # 13
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

I would just ignore her comments and chalk them up to crazy bride moments. I would feel flattered about her copying your wedding.  It’s not worth the craziness.

Post # 14
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Since yours is already done I wouldnt let it bother me too much. Its differnt it was like within the same month as each other or she was copying you before your wedding. I ould just ignore her and not care. I think its childish to try to one up someones wedding

Post # 15
Member
2891 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.  She must think A LOT of your taste to go to such extremes to be like you. I would just tell her, “it is sooo sweet that you thought so much of my wedding that you had to copy it.” Hopefully that attitude will take the wind out of her competition sails. Good Luck!

Post # 16
Member
2742 posts
Sugar bee

@hissoon2be: They weren’t at your wedding but they know enough to say she wants to ‘Crush XYZ’s wedding’ and that ‘she wants a bigger ring before the wedding’ Look, they are just out for gossip and to foster resentment between you and your friend. Whatevs. Humans like one-upping each other. It could be that she wants hers to be more memorable than yours. She doesn’t have to go around broadcasting it and her friends should not go around regurgitating her catty comments. Sounds like a viper’s nest to me.

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