(Closed) Bridezilla? Really? (just needed to vent)

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
139 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

I don’t think you’re being a bridezilla. Personally I have spent a lot of time and research into planning the wedding, and I can promise Fiance would be upset if a close friend decided to do that. Is it a popular venue? Maybe it’s already booked (fingers crossed!)

Post # 4
1956 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Tannery Pond at the Darrow School

I would be upset as well but unfortunately, it’s ultimately her decision, which sucks…Do you guys have a lot of cross-over guests?? If there’s only a few who would be attending both, then it won’t be such a big deal but if there’s a lot, then I would def be pissed…I’m sorry!

Post # 6
549 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

OMG i can TOTALLY relate!! My Future brother and sister in law did the EXACT same thing!!! Their wedding is a couple months before ours, but obviously will have like half the same people… which isnt even the part that bugs me either… it’s that fact that I’ll see practically my own wedding reception just months before mine actually happens.  Good luck!  We tried everything, talking, reasoning, threatening to change our location and lose a deposit… nothing worked! So now, I’m just sucking it up and it SUCKS because nobody else seems to think it will be a problem!!  GOOD LUCK! stay positive… and keep thinking of ways to makes yours more unique!!  The benefit I found in it all, and that you can see too… you will be able to see what works and what doesnt, and still have some time to change things if you need to 🙂 pick different foods, change the layout, whatever! yours will be beautiful and perfect, and entirely you and FI!  Best of luck!!! (and I know… it sucks!!)

Post # 7
520 posts
Busy bee

I would be pissed!  She’s a biatch ~ sorry. 

Post # 8
2641 posts
Sugar bee

I can’t blame you for being upset.  Ok, if she is pregnant, and wants to get married before the baby, I get it.  I’m sure they didn’t plan to have the baby when they did.  She’s just trying to do what’s right.  But in getting married a month before you, it is very bad ballet to use your ideas.

Is she even in your wedding, with the baby due so close?  I’m sorry.  

Post # 10
193 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

i would be upset also! you spent alot of time on planning your wedding and she shouldnt ruin it!

Post # 11
258 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I can relate to this. It is terrible. It is like you want to cry, get mad and be sick all at the same time.

I have someone who has “asked” or told me they were going to get the same dress, have the wedding the same weekend or slightly before and at the same reception site.

And they always get mad at me when I ask them not to do that. They call me selfish for not sharing. What?!?!

Ugh, I just don’t understand people!! Why do they want to have the same wedding as someone else?!

(sorry for the vent)

Good luck, just take the higher road. There is nothing you can do. Everyone will know that you planned your wedding well in advance of her and will know she copied you.

Post # 12
137 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

What was your guestbook idea?  Was it something really unique?

I can understand your frustration, especially over the venue, but try to see her side.  Speaking from experience, my friends’ wedding was close to ours and I ended up using a lot of similar things to theirs, not because I intentionally copied, but just because we have similar tastes (close friends tend to think alike!).  Also, when it comes to weddings, there really isn’t that much room to differ. 

Can you try to talk to her about it from a curious friend perspective, rather than the perspective of a bride concerned about her wedding?  I have found that things are better received when asked than told.  (For example, “Is this venue the one you really want?  I feel strange having both of our weddings in the same place.” rather than “You cannot have your wedding there.”) 

I am sure the last thing she wants is to upset you and she probably has good intentions.  Good luck!

Post # 13
2703 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

i dont think ur being a bridezilla at all. i think she’s not creative and wants to use all of your ideas, and when you tell her your not okay with it, she resorts to calling you names instead of understanding what it’d be like for her to be in your shoes.

i think you’ve been understanding the entire way. don’t let her make you feel like something you’re clearly not.

Post # 14
71 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Nope, you’re not a bridezilla, maybe she is??  That totally stinks and I’d be pissed too if I were you. SHE’D be pissed if she was in your shoes! Definitely try to talk things out with her…how rude.

Post # 15
829 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

I am sorry but that is f**ked up. I would be livid!

Post # 16
860 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I’d be upset.  Given her circumstances I think it is ok for her to get married a month before you, but it’s crazy that she wants to use the same venue, decorations etc.  Tell her to get her own ideas! 

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