(Closed) bringing kids to adult events

posted 11 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1064 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I would try to discuss it with her again nicely, basically if she can’t get a sitter, she’ll have to skip the event if you feel that strongly.

Another option would be for you to hire someone to watch them in the next room, so while they are not involved in the party, their mother can check on them whenever she feels the need to.

Post # 4
14181 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

Does she have a family member the kids could stay with?

Post # 5
2015 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

If it were me, I would hold my ground and nicely explain that exceptions can’t be made because then everyone will be able to bring their kids, and you simply cannot accomodate them.

If she decides to miss the rehearsal and wedding because of something like this, well, then that’s really her loss, you know? I know plenty of people who leave their kids with recommended sitters. Just ask for references. Gheesh!

Honestly, it just sounds like she wants her kids there, based on what you’ve told us.

Post # 6
3997 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I understand her not wanting to leave the children with a babysitter, but does she have family that they can stay with?  Maybe she can spend just a couple hours at the rehearsal and pick up the kids, no harm there.  I also understand not wanting kids at an adult event.  We don’t want them either.  We love children their parents won’t enjoy themselves as much and you run the risk of them getting hurt.  And if she brings her children she’s bound to open a flood gate, someone else will say, “why’d she get to bring her kids and I couldn’t?”  too much drama!  Good luck

Post # 8
314 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

Easy out — tell her what the woman from the church told you: The church is poorly equipped for children. Worse comes to worse, perhaps you could ask a family member who will not be needed to walk through the rehearsal (an aunt? an older cousin?) take the kids out for ice cream or something while Mom is busy with rehearsal, then afterwards she can go home with the kids and the rest of you can carry on with dinner or whatever you have planned. Try to be flexible with her as you don’t want her to become aggravated and pissy right before your wedding, but you need to be firm about your “no kids” policy.

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