Broke Boyfriend

posted 2 months ago in Relationships
Post # 2
Member
377 posts
Helper bee

Threatening you with suicide is abuse. As unfortunate as it is, sometimes the best thing you can do is tell someone he is close with about his suicidal statements, offer to help him get help by giving him hotlines or a number to a psychologist, and just leave. You cannot let your mental state deteriorate because of his issues. Just make sure you do what you can to let people who are close to him know that he is making these statements and also leave some resources for him so that help is readily available. Additionally, if you leave and truly worry for his safety, there is an emergency hotline you can call and they will come to him. Good luck! 

Post # 3
Member
162 posts
Blushing bee

This guy is not ready for a relationship and maybe never will be. Run.

Post # 4
Member
2917 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

jjem :  It’s pretty shitty to threaten suicide just to keep you from leaving. 

You should 100% leave this guy, he has serious issues, if you’re concerned that he is actually going to harm himself contact his parents and let them deal with him.

Post # 5
Member
94 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: City, State

All of a sudden being suicidal when you make a stand for you or you make him unhappy is emotional manipulation and that is abuse.  I agree with the previous posters, this is not healthy and your mental health is important too.

Post # 6
Member
7464 posts
Busy Beekeeper

jjem :  if you want to break up with him, break up with him. Full stop. If he threatens to kill himself, and you believe he is serious and not saying it to be manipulative, then call the police. 

Post # 7
Member
53 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2019

*comment moderated for violation of TOS*

Post # 8
Member
10456 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

jjem :  

When he threatens suicide, call 911.  Let the experts deal with him. If he’s for real, they are equipped and trained to take care of the situation.  If he’s faking, he won’t be doing that again any time soon.

Even though logic dictates that he is manipulating you, all suicide talk must be taken seriously.  Let the qualified professionals take over.

He is not your responsibility.

 

Post # 9
Member
981 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

kellybride09 :  Uhhh no, lots of people threaten suicide and then go through with it including my step sister. Stop spreading this misinformation!

Post # 10
Member
53 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: December 2019

mel2 :  Not people who do it habitually and in manipulative situations like this.

Post # 11
Member
10456 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

kellybride09 :  

You have no idea WTF you’re talking about.  Stop it.

Post # 12
Member
407 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2019

This sounds so eerily similar to my last relationship — guy couldn’t hold down a job, I paid for everything and also spent about $10,000 on him in 2 years (and then more after, because I was with him for over 4.5 years), he threatened suicide when we broke up. I ended up calling the police to check on him, and they took him to the hospital on a psychiatric hold. Let the professionals deal with this. You do not need to sacrifice your own happiness in order to protect his. That’s not healthy, and it’s not your responsibility. It sounds like you know what you need to do, so even though it might get kind of ugly, I think you need to bite the bullet and break up.

Post # 13
Member
981 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

kellybride09 :  You are 100% wrong. Please stop embarassing yourself.

Post # 14
Member
8783 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

jjem :  If he is going to try to kill himself, he will do it whether you stay or go. If he’s not, then he won’t, whether you stay or go. You are not responsible for his behavior or his mental health. If you leave and he kills himself, it is not your fault any more than if you had stayed and he killed himself. You can’t stop him. At the most, you might delay it a bit, but at what cost to you? He is manipulating you. Also, the punching walls thing is a precursor to physical abuse. It’s meant to scare you and threaten that you could be next if you don’t behave yourself. 

You don’t deserve this and you should not put up with it. Sadly, since you can’t change him or his behavior, the way to not put up with it is to leave. If you stay with him, this is what the rest of your life will be like. 

Post # 15
Member
10456 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

kellybride09 :  

Post a link to a credible source that supports your asinine theories.

My first job in mental health was on a crisis hotline; I have had quite a lot of training and experience in suicide prevention. You could not be more wrong and I will not allow you to post this nonsense unchallenged.

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