(Closed) BROKE UP WITH FIANCE. He is now getting married to a girl he barely knows.

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 17
Member
567 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2018 - Toronto, Ontario

Youre so much better off. Im sorry about your dad i think the breakup is your dad watching over you from above and giving strength so you can do what you need to be happy and healthy. 

That loser does not deserve you and i understand there is goodness in every person but he is sick because drugs fry away bits of your system i have friends whove been on drugs and after that they just recieve the world differently from you and i and in their way their behaviour makes perfect sense. You cant fix him you cant replace an absent father and give him mothers acceptance. Hes missing a screw and no amount of glue will hold him together.

 

If youre lonely at night take up a second job or take a night class youll look forward to. Who knows maybe youll meet someone more like yourself- kind and sweet and normal. Stop trying to fix all the broken people like ur ex and ur friend

Post # 18
Member
545 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

No offence but he’s a loser. You will find someone SO MUCH BETTER who will treat you better, cherish you, and let you be who you are and love you for who you are. 

Post # 19
Member
187 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

This is a lot of great advice from the bees and I agree. You seem kind hearted and have gone through a rough time mainly your dad’s passing, which will take time to cope with, but in rememberance of your dad you did the right thing by leaving that guy. To me, it seems your dad was warning you about him blowing gasket and hurting you one day. You could tell the ex friend to be careful but she probably will not listen. So, you should look at the happiness and relief that your family is feeling and be positive about the right decision that you made. I thought I met a good guy (preacher’s son) once and thought he was it. Except we got married and over a year he changed more and more. I found out he had a drug history and all it took was one time for me to say something and he blew a gasket. Hit me til my teeth were knocked out in the back of my mouth and threatened to hit my children. He left that night and tried to come back but I was not for it. I am now happily divorced. I decided some months afterward to get online and do some flirting and I met my now fiance’ who has changed my world and my children’s for the better. I just want you to know when you do the right thing there is a light at the end of the tunnel. As far as being lonely I would say get a pet or enjoy the peace by exercising.  Many blessings to you!Laughing *hugs*

Post # 23
Hostess
7547 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: January 2013

It’s so hard to move on when your ex keeps trying to pull you back in. Perhaps you should ask your friends to ignore him and don’t tell you if he contacts them. This man is toxic. It sounds like a clean break is just what you need. 

Post # 24
Member
181 posts
Blushing bee

Hes baiting you. By being with a woman who is the polar opposite of you, by being engaged so soon after you two break up, by bringing you up to friends. Hes trying to get you to react aka respond. Please keep ignoring him as much as you can. Ask your friends to not talk about him because that makes it harder to move on even tho you are curious. 

All women should ask themselves two questions about the guy/girl they are with.
“Do I trust this person to have my best interest at heart?” and “Would I set this person up with a friend, knowing all his faults?”.

Post # 27
Member
1715 posts
Bumble bee

I’m glad you are out of that situation and away from him.

But this girl having plastic surgery and tattoos has nothing to do with what kind of person she is.

Post # 28
Member
2522 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

Is this real life? :O

Post # 31
Member
429 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

View original reply
@jazzyrhae:  I was in a VERY similar situation to this years ago. I wont go into to much detail here because theres a lot but Ill give you the jist and if you ever wanna chat privately you can always shoot me a mesage. I was with a guy who was a former drug user (which I also didnt know anything about it, his drug of choice was cocaine and I have never even seen it in my life and dont do any drugs ever). He always told me “you’ll leave me one day just like everyone else has” (he was given up for adoption at 2 years old and used this against me all the time even though clearly it had nothing to do with me). Within a few months into the relationship he was so controlling (I also associated this with his former drug use) got mad when I was with friends, got mad about certain outfits, got mad that I was a waitress when we were together (I was in school at the time and he met me when I was a waitress), he made me so sad all the time (I was always happy go lucky before, loved life went out all the time etc) he made me feel like I was walking on eggshells every day of my life for a year and a half. He proposed to me I said no and finally got the courage to kick him out of my life. His parents were also on my side they knew whatI was dealing with (they appreciated what I did for him by keeping him away from drugs and got him to enroll in the army to seriously straighten out his life, although that made it worse sometimes I think because then he used that against me all the time too) but thats when things got really bad. They went from bad to horrible, threatning texts and other bad things. My parents hated him from the day they met him, he wasnt allowed at my parents house, my friends hated him just as much. This is just the tip of the iceberg, let me tell you your ex sounds like my ex to a T, Im telling you leaving him is the best decision you have ever made in your life EVER! I am with the man of my dreams now and as happy as I ever could be in life, I cant imagine my life any other way, you will get there too, just stay away from this guy its the best thing for you he is toxic!

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