(Closed) Brother as a groomsman — Help, please!

posted 9 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
735 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: January 2009

I’m sure people will ask questions but then again people ALWAYS ask questions.

 I had a similar situtation and i actually asked my step bro to be a Groomsmen as kinda of a peace offering… he said yes then dropped out 3 weeks before the wedding. Fiance and I didn’t really care but my step mom (his mom) was really upset which made my dad upset. They were all OK at the wedding but we didn’t get any pictures with him and the family which I think is kinda sad but again its his fault.

Post # 4
1023 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Do you want a better long term relationship with your brother? If so, I think that he at least deserves a heart to heart talk about why you are considering or won’t be including him in the wedding party. And maybe he won’t be offended at all or won’t want the responsibility of being in the party?

Post # 5
250 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

TallBride is right, there will always be some people who will question everything no matter what you do. But there’s probably just as many that won’t even notice! Though if you’re including  the majority of other family, it might stand out a little more. I guess it depends on how bad you think he could really be. It might preserve peace in the family in the long run, if you can handle it.

Post # 6
1363 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

It’s a tough decision to have to make.  My gut says that if you’re hoping that leaving your brother out of the wedding party will reduce the chance that he has an outburst, you might be shooting yourself in the foot.  I think it sends a pretty strong message, and if I were the only family member left out, I’d be both hurt and angry.  Good luck, and I hope everyone behaves well!

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