(Closed) Brother bought engagement ring today *RANT*

posted 8 years ago in Family
  • poll: Who's the ridiculous one in this situation?
    Me : (95 votes)
    61 %
    Mom : (47 votes)
    30 %
    Brother : (2 votes)
    1 %
    Other : (12 votes)
    8 %
  • Post # 3
    1986 posts
    Buzzing bee

    @heyimkate: Yes, I think you’re being a little bit ridiculous 🙂 It’s ok though, we all have our moments 🙂

    Post # 4
    4485 posts
    Honey bee

    I don’t think you’re being ridiculous. Your mom’s comment was uncalled for though and she has no business pressuring your brother to propose earlier than planned or making you feel like crap.

    Post # 5
    10366 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: September 2010

    I don’t really know what to tell you except that you don’t own the season or your wedding day. You’ve had weeks to announce. If you don’t want to overlap, I suggest you say something now, and be happy for your brother.

    I do think you’re out of line. It doesn’t take away from your marriage, and it doesn’t take away from your parent’s happiness for both of you. You are the only one taking your happiness away from yourself.

    Post # 6
    3521 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    @crayfish: Agreed; you said everything I was going to say.

    Post # 7
    3295 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    i have to agree with the pp’s…. i think you should just be happy for your brother… it will be neat being able to announce and plan your wedding so close to oneanother!

    Post # 8
    2465 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2010

    i think your mom is being ridiculous in that it sounds like she’s pressuring your brother into buying a ring and proposing sooner than he planned!

    but if he does want to propose now, then it’s fine for him to, and being upset about it would be a bit ridiculous.

    Post # 9
    18637 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2009

    Yeah I think your mom was sort of strange to push him into buying the ring and proposing so quickly but I think you just need to be happy for him.  I’m confused as to why you haven’t told them since you are with your mom right now.

    Post # 10
    600 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    wait… you said you told your families in your IIM ENGAGED” post.

    Post # 11
    5984 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: January 1999

    I chose “other”.  It seems that everyone, except your brother, is being “ridiculous”.  I’m sure that you want your moment to “glisten” as you share with your relatives that you’re engaged and wouldn’t want your brother’s potential engagement to “overshadow” your excitement.  However, I do think your Mom shouldn’t “pressure” your brother into proposing.  It’s totally up to him, but I’m sure that she’s feeling quite “giddy” that her babies have found love.  If you’re brother wants to propose early, he can propose.  Let’s not forget to share in his happiness too!  Peace out!

    Post # 12
    1645 posts
    Bumble bee

    I don’t think you’re being ridiculous at all. It’s a little out of your hands, but your mom definitely doesn’t need to be pressuring him like that. My SO’s mom pushed him into an engagement that turned into the marriage from hell (this was years ago). NOT saying your brothers gf isn’t anything but wonderful, but these things need to come when the two parties in question are ready. SO tells me now that in hindsight, had his mother not literally put a ring into his hands to give to her–the relationship would have probably ended shortly thereafter. Womp womp.

    Post # 13
    759 posts
    Busy bee

    I agree with crayfish.  There’s nothing you can do about it except be happy for your brother.  Don’t let his proposal put a damper on the joy you are experiencing about your recent engagement.  This is a time for you to be happy and share your good news, don’t let something like this get in the way of that.

    Post # 14
    10287 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I voted other because I think both you and your mother are being ridiculous. I don’t think your brother is doing anything wrong. 

    While I don’t think your mother should be pushing your brother into proposing, I also don’t think that you should be as upset over this as you are. Like a number of PP’s said, you only get one day not a few months. 

    Post # 15
    4419 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 2010

    Your mom wants to see both you and your brother happy.  That’s what moms want for their children, for them to be happy.

    Your brother has been planning on proposing, so he can do it whenever he wants. And just because he’s bought the ring, doesn’t mean he’ll give in to your mom’s pressure. But even if he does ask at her at Christmas or New Year’s, he’s allowed to change his mind about when he wants to ask her.

    Since you like your brother’s girlfriend, the two of you could end up having a lot of fun planning your weddings. Hope your family is prepared for all the wedding talk that will be going on! LOL

    Nothing wrong with venting and getting it off your chest. Just remember that one person’s engagement (even your brother’s) has nothing to do with your engagement.

    “…when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.”  Harry Burns from When Harry Met Sally

    Post # 16
    141 posts
    Blushing bee

    I dont get why your mom is pushing your brother so hard…first to buy the ring and then to propose. I understand your feelings but I think you should just relax  since you cant change anything.

    Congratulations on your engagement.

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