- 2 years ago
- Wedding: May 2018
My sister and the husband has been married for 4 years (and dated 4 years). Before they got married i see him as such an amazing person, always fun always there to help..it was during the wedding planning that I (the sister of the bride) saw him as a fake person. I am very very very close to my sister since we were young.. she’s my everything and we’re close in age. I saw how he made her happy and was at first i was happy for them (not knowing theres more to just having good looks and a fun persoanlity). We lost a brother when we were in our 20s from a car accident, and she’s all i have left..besides my parents ofcourse.
it all started from the wedding planning. With the money he couldn’t bring to the table (my family has to pay for the wedding) he invited people more than my family could afford and when my sister has to stop him, he made my sister look like the bad evil bridezilla (noone knew that he didnt give in a single cent, they all think my sister is cheap and he explains it tht way) since the wedding people think differently of my sister and greatly of my brother in law. and his family expects us to pay for everything..eventhough his dad is probably richer than my dad. (CEO of 5 big companies). my parents are so kind they give everything to make my sister happiest on her wedding day… he does come from a dysfunctional family. 2 of his brothers have mental illness (diagnosed) and his little sister is the brattiest most suicidal person in the world. she has no friends and everyone knows she is mental. i can’t stand her and her behaviour.
After they got married, my father gave him/them everything, the apartment, his own car and holidays. He did start to work for my dad, so his family thought he deserved to received all of that from my father . at first it was great because he was a great companion to my dad (after my brother died…) but at the end, he was not qualified enough and he lost my dad a lot of money. they work in the same company but different division.. and even that..my family still loves him, my sister still supports him (i do too…)
my sister has been trying for a baby for 3 years now. with every cycle failing..she has been broken beyond words. the husband was caught cheating a couple months after their wedding with a prostitute. and again when my sister was waiting to see the result of her IVF with another prostitute and with a random girl after she had a miscarriage and with a “masseusse” a couple months ago and last weekend with a girl he met at his friend’s bachelor party. he’s telling her how much he wished he met her sooner and that he was planning all these trips with her and he was supposed to meet her at a friend’s bachelor party but she cancelled last minute..so..he’s been planning to cheat on my sister.
i promise to never meddle with their marriage, but ive been crying these past 3 days with my sister knowing how much pain she is right now, and that the only way out is to get a divorce. she thinks she would rather die and her world is shattered. i love my sister more than my own life so to see her so so broken is to be so so broken as well.
they’ve gone to marriage counsellors, but he is a fake person and in public he acts like he loves my sister like he’s the greatest husband but i see them alone and i see how unhappy he is with my sister. i know my sister loves him more than he loves her. but i could never tell her this..my sister gave him everything that she has and its still not enough for him. she thinks there is something wrong with her.
all he thinks is going out getting drunk as f*** and go home to my sister and say mean things to her like” you’re nothing without me, what would you be if i left you” and so on.. but he CAN switch to be the sweetest person ever the next day, and cooks for her and do things for her and so she forget.. and not a lot of people can see how fake he is!!!!! i really think he will hurt my sister again, and he will not change.
am i crazy to want them to get a divorce and want her to find someone that will love her like she used to be loved in her previous relationships (even my sister admits this). i know this is none of my business but please help me what should i do? its impossible to talk to him because he will say things that we want to hear..how to suggest to get a divorce to your sister???