(Closed) Brother-In-Laws/Sister-In-Laws? When does it stop?

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
7638 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Amy and Greg are not in-laws. Wiki is wrong in this case: “brother of one’s sibling’s spouse” is not an in-law.

The way I think of it is in terms of families. When Alice married Matt, she joined the “B” family, so is an “in-law” to everything Matt is. i.e. where Matt is a son, she is a daughter-in-law. Where Matt is Greg’s brother, she is Greg’s sister-in-law. This of course is reflected in family functions, where Alice is welcomed as part of the family, since she is married to Matt.

But Amy did not marry into the B family so is not Greg’s SIL. Similarly Matt married into the “A” family, but Greg did not.

Amy and Greg are not in-laws because there is no family there are both part of. Amy is in the A family but not the B family. Greg is in the B family but not the A family.

Post # 4
47420 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I have never thought of or called my Brother-in-law’s wife, my sister-in-law. She is my Brother-in-law’s wife.

My hubby’s sister is my sister-in-law.

Post # 5
3941 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

This is really strange because my Husbands name is Greg and his brothers name is Matt…haha.

But I have always referred to Matt’s wife as my sister-in-law. 

Post # 6
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

All of those I consider brother in law except for the last one: brother of one’s siblings spouse.

My husband’s brother, Greg*, is definitely my brother in law. 

When my sister Holly* gets married her husband will be my brother in law.

And when my husabnd’s sister Molly* gets married her husband will then be part of the family too just like me and then he will also be my brother in law. 

But Holly’s husband, Mike’s*, brother? I wouldn’t consider him related to me at all. He’d be Holly’s brother in law, but not mine. 

Post # 7
3120 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

How interesting!  My brother and I are both married.  I would think the DH and my SIL think of themselves in-laws, but I’m trying to think how he would refer to her.  Maybe “My wife’s SIL?” I don’t know!!!

ETA:  DH says he considers my SIL to be his SIL.

Post # 8
7638 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Yes I also consider my husband’s sister’s husband my Brother-In-Law. Again applying the families principle: assuming my husband’s surname is Smith, we both married into the Smith family, so he is my Brother-In-Law my our shared membership of the Smith family.

In My Humble Opinion. in-law covers marriage only. It can be one or two marriage links, but no sibling links.

Husband’s sister’s husband = brother-in-law

brother’s wife’s brother = unrelated (just SIL’s brother)

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