(Closed) Brother-In-Laws/Sister-In-Laws? When does it stop?

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 3
7750 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Amy and Greg are not in-laws. Wiki is wrong in this case: “brother of one’s sibling’s spouse” is not an in-law.

The way I think of it is in terms of families. When Alice married Matt, she joined the “B” family, so is an “in-law” to everything Matt is. i.e. where Matt is a son, she is a daughter-in-law. Where Matt is Greg’s brother, she is Greg’s sister-in-law. This of course is reflected in family functions, where Alice is welcomed as part of the family, since she is married to Matt.

But Amy did not marry into the B family so is not Greg’s SIL. Similarly Matt married into the “A” family, but Greg did not.

Amy and Greg are not in-laws because there is no family there are both part of. Amy is in the A family but not the B family. Greg is in the B family but not the A family.

Post # 4
46371 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I have never thought of or called my Brother-in-law’s wife, my sister-in-law. She is my Brother-in-law’s wife.

My hubby’s sister is my sister-in-law.

Post # 5
3947 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

This is really strange because my Husbands name is Greg and his brothers name is Matt…haha.

But I have always referred to Matt’s wife as my sister-in-law. 

Post # 6
4464 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

All of those I consider brother in law except for the last one: brother of one’s siblings spouse.

My husband’s brother, Greg*, is definitely my brother in law. 

When my sister Holly* gets married her husband will be my brother in law.

And when my husabnd’s sister Molly* gets married her husband will then be part of the family too just like me and then he will also be my brother in law. 

But Holly’s husband, Mike’s*, brother? I wouldn’t consider him related to me at all. He’d be Holly’s brother in law, but not mine. 

Post # 7
3121 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

How interesting!  My brother and I are both married.  I would think the Darling Husband and my SIL think of themselves in-laws, but I’m trying to think how he would refer to her.  Maybe “My wife’s SIL?” I don’t know!!!

ETA:  DH says he considers my SIL to be his SIL.

Post # 8
7750 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Yes I also consider my husband’s sister’s husband my BIL. Again applying the families principle: assuming my husband’s surname is Smith, we both married into the Smith family, so he is my BIL my our shared membership of the Smith family.

In My Humble Opinion. in-law covers marriage only. It can be one or two marriage links, but no sibling links.

Husband’s sister’s husband = brother-in-law

brother’s wife’s brother = unrelated (just SIL’s brother)

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