(Closed) Budget help – talking to the future in-laws

posted 7 years ago in Money
Post # 3
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

I would say no matter how close you are, this is a conversation your fiance should be involved in and lead even if you are there. 

You could ask them do they want to pick something to pay for or would they like to give you a check for whatever they are comfortable with for you to use as you see fit.

I would go with a list of things they could pay for like flowers, bar, rehearsal dinner, etc.  I would do a little research for your area so you know about what these could cost so they have an idea.

Post # 5
Member
166 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

This is a conversation that HAS to be done by your fiance.  If it needs to be you AND your fiance, then that’s ok.  The two of you need to sit down and decide what would be good to say.  Probably the best way to go about it is to be very frank.  Say to them that you are starting to get into the planning phase of the wedding and would be thrilled if they could contribute.  If they want their money to go to something specific, let that happen.  If they want to give you a chunk of change, then use it wisely and thank them for specific things you decided to do with it. 

Post # 6
Member
4824 posts
Honey bee

Well then figure out what you can afford, without her help and let her know.

Figure out how much you and your fiance can contribute based on what you have saved and are willing to spend, plus what you can save each month. That combined with your parents $ is your budget. And anything she gives you, obviously, is bonus.

Post # 7
Member
5110 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: November 2011

I think you could be there and that would be fine, but your Fiance needs to take the reins on this convorsation. 

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