(Closed) Budget woes and not even married yet

posted 7 years ago in Married Life
Post # 3
4824 posts
Honey bee

Are you living with parents now or on your own? If you are on your own then it will be easy because you will only have 1 set of bills.

I would sit with him BEFORE getting married and discuss your plans and goals that relate to money, saving and spending. It really helps to be on the same page.

I would make a list for 5 years, 10 years, and retirement. 

Then look at your estimated income and create a budget based on estimated expenses.  This will help you determine how much you can afford to pay in rent, savings, going out to eat and other entertainment… Also it will prepare you for things like not having cable if you can’t afford it.

Its really important that you save as soon as you can start saving and that you both go into the marriage knowing what you condider acceptable expenses. IE buying lunch everyday is not OK if you can’t save money for a house, future baby, retirement.

Then once that is all done make a plan to reach those goals you listed. Maybe its opening a savings acct dedicated to a down payment, or to put money aside to invest in a ROTH IRA, or to max out any company matching 401K

And many local colleges and centers have personal finance classes. It would be really beneficial to each of you to take one!

Post # 4
1235 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@ERnurse: FI and I are stressed about money too. Hes in grad school and can only work a certain amount of hours, and I dont make enough working full time to support us both. Remember (and I keep telling myself this too) that sacrfices will be necessary but in a few years youll look back on this time and be amazed at how you two can get through these tough times together 🙂

Post # 6
46590 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

There are jobs in nursing that are less stressful than others. Have you looked into telenursing , home health or public health nursing?

Post # 7
4824 posts
Honey bee

Also, for years I had a second job until I got far enough along in my career.

Look at your career paths. Will you always be living pay check to pay check? Or will it just take time to establish yourselves? 

If you will always be pay check to paycheck, you may have to go back to nursing, but be creative. I have a friend that is a nurse that works on a helpline, not in a hospital and workse normal working hours. Think outside the box. Start job searcing to see what is out there that could work for you.

Post # 9
2422 posts
Buzzing bee

In my opinion, I’d go back to nursing at least for a while to help make ends meet. OR keep your current job but have one of you get a part-time job to help things along. That way whatever you make with the second job could be saved. 

And if I were in your situation, I’d take some of his “emergency” fund (which is quite sizeable) and pay down his student loans. That will help him get out of debt faster. 

Post # 10
4419 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

@ERnurse:  It’s great that you’re already aware of your financial situation and thinking about what you’re going to do before you get married. You do have some time, because you’re not getting married for another year, so things could change a lot in that time.  

Maybe both of you could look into getting second jobs.  I would recommend he put his money towards his student loans and you put your money towards building up your savings even more. I know it sounds like it would be a good idea to help him pay off his student loans now, but I don’t recommend doing that.  Heaven forbid that something happens, but if something did happen, you’d never get that money back and right now you are not legally obligated to pay those loans. Once you’re married, then you could take some of the money you’ve saved and put a big chunk into paying off the student loans.  The old adage, hope for the best but plan for the worst applies here. Plus, the two of you might really need the money you’re putting away after your married. 

The big thing for you is to try and find more income. But it looks like you’re doing pretty good right now. 

Post # 11
1667 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

@SuperKate: <—- THIS

I know it may suck for a while, but a lot of us have jobs we don’t love in order for us to pay the bills. Go back to nursing, at least until you guys are in a better position financially, it may be stressful, but try to find the joy in the job, you are helping people and providing a vital service.

I’m in a job i don’t love, but for right now, it’s what needs to be done for Darling Husband and I to build up savings and accumulate a down payment for a home.

Good luck!

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