(Closed) Budget Woes…is it ALL worth it in the end?

• DJones69
• 8 years ago

• Wedding: March 2008

@Madelin:  If you spend a few days in Downtown LA, you’ll find everything for CHEAP. Table covers for $1.00 – 1.50. Sashes for the chairs were 50 cents.

• Cynderbug
• 8 years ago

• Wedding: June 2014 - British Columbia

+1 with sticker shock.

Canadians spend on average $18k for a wedding. Fiance and I don’t have a budget yet, but I will be tracking everything down in Excel. I’m just hoping everything (after gratuities + PST) won’t shoot anywhere past $15k.

Long before I got engaged, my original budget was $5k — I was seriously thinking of renting a community hall with a kitchen, find an army of friends to help me cater (that’s wedding gift enough), refurbished wedding dress from Goodwill, and DIY a lot of things. When I told my mother about that budget, she was like.. is it $5k each from you and SO? I’m like, no.. $5k total. Then, she got really upset even though I told her I would rather have the money spent on home renovations and a new furnace. She’s like, “Your big day is a one time thing..” That means, she wants to see her little girl throw a shindig. She even tried this reason, saying that if I invited a lot more Chinese guests, I’d get my costs back. (Excusez-moi, meme!! But that’s not the whole point of having a wedding — receiving red packets/gifts)

After looking at the most reasonable of venues, our budget would have to start at $10k. We will be finalizing our budget next weekend… I’m really tempted to use broccoli as flowers. It’s edible and it won’t break the bank.

• MsW-to-MrsM
• 8 years ago

• Wedding: September 2014

You said you aren’t going into debt, so that’s good.

In my personal opinion, which derives from my own personal socioeconomic status, I think it’s absolutely insane.

If I could afford a 28k wedding and honestly didn’t have a better use for that money, then I would probably not think it was insane, so take my opinion with a grain of salt.

Of course, the amount is really irrelevant. I know what it’s like to make a budget and then soar over it. It’s never a good idea, but it always happens.

• CARA1978
• 8 years ago

• Wedding: October 2013

@Cynderbug:  My budjet is $5K and we’re sticking to it no matter what.  I know people balked at the idea of having such a “cheap” wedding, but my simple solution is to not have a large guest list.  As hard as $5K may be, I’m sticking to it.  

• Aadams4
• 8 years ago

• Wedding: March 2014

@Madelin:  I am also in Southern California but up in Ventura County. We initially budgeted for $20k as well as of now we are at $24k But that includes absolutely everything for 75-85 people. We found a newer garden venue in Moorpark that has a really low site fee and catering costs as well. The things that put us over budget were my dress of course and extra flowers. We are paying around $10,000 for the venue and catering. To me its totally worth it but things are definitely more money out here. Did you already sign the contract for the venue? You could always find one where you dont have to rent everything. 

• newcitylights
• 8 years ago

My sister’s starting budget was $13,000. She got a steal on the venue (less than $2,000 in a metropolitan area) and DIY’ed like crazy: all paper (programs, invites, STDs), flowers, confetti, decorations for venue and centerpieces, hair/makeup, boutonnieres, iPod reception, furnished her own alcohol, had my mom do her dress alterations. Her caterer was $40 a head, including food, linens, dishes, etc.

 

She still went over budget by $7,000. I have NO idea where it all went.

 

We have the same starting budget and are already over by $2,000 after booking everything. I hope we don’t go over by too much because I want to move into our own house!

• Cynderbug
• 8 years ago

• Wedding: June 2014 - British Columbia

@CARA1978:  That is good!

Unfortunately, between Fiance and myself, just immediate family members alone make it really close to 100. My mother had initially wanted to invite extended family members and her friends, which would top it over 200 people. A typical Chinese banquet is around 200/300+ people. I told her 150 people maximum, firm. We will, however, see how many people would actually drive 5 to 6 hours to attend a destination wedding.

If I could have had it my way, this is where I would get married. (But that would mean no cousins) I enjoy cooking and would have gladly prepped all the meals for 28 people, with the help of a few other family members. http://northlandlodgecanada.com/full-rental/index.html

And that venue is under $5k in the Canadian Rockies. You pay 0% PST in Alberta. So, after 5% GST, that would be $3,934. My dress was $750. But no.. if I don’t do what my mother wants, she will be very depressed and put me on her guilt trip. (I don’t get it.. if I spent money on shoes, she would lecture me, but not over-spending on a wedding??)

Things I am skimping on/doing without, which would give my mother further budget skimping shock:
– professional photography
– DJ
– Make-up/hair
– Wedding-cake
– Favours (If I do them, I’m baking lebkuchen; German gingerbread cookies)

But it’s a bit too early to really know at this point. Fiance and I are going to view our venue next weekend. 🙂

• MrsSkeletonKey
• 8 years ago

• Wedding: July 2013

Tough question.

Originally I wanted to elope in order to keep myself from that sticker shock, and also to spare myself from the planning.

But my Fiance & I decided that wasn’t right for us, so we went the traditional route. It turned out that my 4k budget wasn’t going to put much of dent in it, so now we are just above 6k with nearly every single thing planned. The planning has been much less stressful and more fun than I expected though, so I’m glad it’s at least been a pleasant experience.

I think when my day if over and my pocket book is about 6.5k lighter, I will be a bit bummed, but when I see those amazing pictures of my big day and about how perfect it really did all go, I won’t regret it. I honestly believe it will be my dream wedding, and I think working with 6k and getting that is tough, so I must have done something right.

But, to be honest, if my wedding was going to be more than $7k, I would just ditch the whole plan & elope. To me, as a college student, that kind of money is EVERYTHING. I still regret the idea of spending as much as I am, but I can’t imagine my day with even one less detail than I’m already having.

 

• housebee
• 8 years ago

• Wedding: April 2013

I think “worth it” depends on how much you spend, how much expendable income/funds you have, and what you want out of the day.  Some people love being hosts and throwing parties, others don’t.  For us, 75% of our expendable income/savings went to purchase our home, leaving us the remainder for our wedding budget.  Since we weren’t actively saving up for anything after our home purchase, our wedding wasn’t much of a burden for us.  My original budget was $10k, however I ended up going to $12k after adding photography upgrades and rehearsal dinner/thank you brunch (this includes: tax, gratuities, rings, etc).

• AngelR88
• 8 years ago

• Wedding: July 2009

@michiru4ever:  I think you statement about people just being jealous is quite a generalization. For some people priorities simplie lie elsewhere.  I literally did not start planning my wedding until about 1.5 months before the actual day, and yes, this includes booking the venue and all that stuff people do a year in advance.  For me, the wedding was just about the two of us getting married, and I refused to spend a ton of money.  The honeymoon, solidifying our finances, and purchasing a home were our priorities.  Had I spent a ton in a wedding, we would not have been able to buy a condo in Miami which we now rent for a significant profit, a profit which makes it easier to now have a beautiful 3/2 home in a lake and with a pool and jacuzzi in S. Fla. All at age 25. 

Again, not everyone is jealous.  Some of us just care about other stuff A LOT more than a wedding.  For those of us, going over budget IS NOT worth it. 

• mrspinkiepie
• 8 years ago

• Wedding: May 2013

@Madelin:  I set a budget in my head of about 7k. i went over slightly.  I really did my research and explored all options. I honestly did not skip out on quality over cost. I found vendors who are family friends,  retired from the business, asked round for referrals, ect. It was worth it. the money i spent was well spent. 🙂 I am happy with what i came up with!

• CARA1978
• 8 years ago

• Wedding: October 2013

@Cynderbug:  I see what you mean.  We both have really small families: Fiance has no living family and I have very few relatives so the guest list will mostly be made up of close friends. 

• michiru4ever
• 8 years ago

• Wedding: Central Park

@AngelR88:  There’s absolutely nothing wrong with not wanting to spend a lot of money on a wedding. Just like there’s nothing wrong with wanting to spend money on an event that you’ve been thinking about since you were a kid. But I think that a lot of women who come on here and keep posting stuff like “it’s just one day” say stuff like this from a place of hurt feelings. Someone who is secure in saying “I only want to spend $xxx on my wedding because owing a house is more important to us” probably don’t feel the need to budget check everyone by saying that “it’s just one day” when a bride posts asking for budgeting advice. IMO 99% of the time when this happens in threads the poster is pretty much saying “you’re materialistic for wanting to spend that much money on one day and you should feel guilty.”

• AngelR88
• 8 years ago

• Wedding: July 2009

@michiru4ever:  I think everyone should do whatever is going to make them happy, for sure.  If spending 50k, or 40 or 20 or whatever is what makes someone happy, then for that person it is definitely worth it.  The one thing I would do differently if I were to get married now (instead of 4 years ago when I was just starting law school and in a different financial situation) is that I would get better photogaphy (I hired a photojournalist without much experience in weddings).  That’s my only regret.  I still think that for someone like myself, for whom owning a house is more important, the expense of today’s weddings is not worth it.  With that being said, we are all a little materialistic.  I like some very expensive $%^&& for my house.  Yet, I wear a “small” diamond, did not spend almost any money on a wedding, and do not wear designer clothes, even though we make a pretty decent money.  Worth is a subjective thing depending on one’s likes and priorities.  For me, the expense of a wedding is simply not worth it.  For others, it might be.  

• ceebree
• 8 years ago

@Madelin:  My budget was $10,000 and I came in a bit under at $9,00.  I had an exact max for each item, and I didn’t go for a vendor/supplier unless they could match my budget!  I did a LOT of negociating and DIY.  Most vendors would rather get your business at a discounted price than not at all (at least in my experience).